Thursday, December 31, 2009

Hubby wants a new kick-ass camera

Because sooner than we thought, we're having a little one and Vince definitely wants better pictures than this grainy one:

Well, it still took our breath away.

And with that, I'd like to say that this year may have been difficult for us all but God is faithful and good and He keeps pouring down His blessings on us all if we just open our eyes and see the wonder of His hands. Life is pretty amazing! Tomorrow is another year and, for me and Vince, we're already sure it's going to be very very different and full of endless surprises. Well, isn't each day a surprise?

One thing that continues to surprise me and make me happy is how there are so many of you reading this blog! Thank you! You've been a big part of my life, my dear Topaz Horizon readers, and now my life is about to change yet again and if you'd like to join the ride, come along, come along! And if you feel like sending my husband a spankin' brand new Olympus EP-1, why bless your heart!

Happy New Year!

Friday, December 25, 2009

Happy Holidays!

My goodness! I know I haven't updated but that's because these past few days have been beyond amazing! I'll tell you more about that later on when the busyness of the season has died down.

So we had Christmas dinner with my Sales family last night. That was the best Sales Christmas dinner so far because the kids outdid themselves--from a musical performance on the marimba by darling Elizabeth and Michael Jackson dance numbers by the irrepressible Zo to a Christmas play written, directed, produced and starred in by Elizabeth, Zo, Kevin, Sean, Auntie Gigi, Mommy Lizelle, Uncle Phil, Uncle Vince and Auntie Frances (with music, effects and scenery helpfully provided by Joe, Uncle Lit and Lola Di!)!!!

Then today was spent with my Amper family. We basically spent all afternoon outdoing ourselves on the Playstation's Rock Band. What incredible fun! I mean, we're such a musical family so Rock Band should be a cinch but oh no, we were so bad!!! But that wasn't what mattered--it was being together again and having a jolly good time.

Ack, no pictures yet. Too sleepy now. Will update as soon as I can. In the meantime, I hope you all had a Merry Christmas and I wish you and your family a Happy (and more prosperous!) New Year!

Saturday, December 12, 2009

Out of the woods

I think I'm finally out of a depression. Regular readers, you know I haven't had a good November. Now, I think I can finally explain what happened. A huge opportunity was offered to me the day before my birthday. It's so huge--in terms of prestige and money--that I was, and still am, reeling from it, so dazzled and flattered was I.

This is a good thing, right? Well, it is. But even as I thought about and then finally accepted the new opportunity, I began wondering if I made the right decision. It wasn't actually a done deal yet--I still had to go through some processes--but as I went through each step, I began to get restless. The littlest things upset me. I had a hard time sleeping. I would often find myself sighing and crying quietly but regularly like the maddening dripping from broken kitchen faucets.

I went on shopping sprees (will blog about my new vintage finds soon!). I became more tired than usual. I stopped doing my chores. My clothes and papers started piling up, my mess started creeping from my desk and my side of our bed to the living and dining areas. Vince, very neat and organized Vince, kept quiet but offered gently to help clean up, and I'd say, "No, no, I'll do that myself." But I won't. At work, I projected my happy self. But inside I was feeling unsure and stressed, and couldn't find pleasure in the job I love.

The few who knew about the offer (except OK!'s managing editor Lana and our ninong sa kasal who thought the brand was a dinosaur) was just as dazzled. They said, "Take it! Take it!" And I did! I felt like I grew shinier in their eyes. But as the final interview ended and the Americans said they were "very impressed," I ended that overseas call with a heavy heart, wiped my tears away and looked through OK! magazine and realized I just can't leave it. Not yet. I also wasn't ready to spend 24/7 doing something new--I'm like that: When I'm involved in a new project, I forsake everything else. When my mother died, I haven't seen her in almost 2 months, because I was that busy. I don't want to be that busy again.

So yesterday, after exactly 5 weeks of incredible highs and crushing lows, I turned down the offer. The night before, I alarmed Vince by sobbing my explanation: "I'm happy where I am now. I want to be grateful, not greedy." I think Vince was confused--being a man, he is the conquering type and thought the offer would be a great challenge, which he knew I liked. He also liked the money. Hell, I did, too. But I've always followed my heart, and look where my heart brought me--OK! magazine, my lovely home, and most wonderful of all, my darling husband Vince. My heart told me I wasn't ready to rock this boat. In the end, Vince assured me that he supports my decision. And I know he does, although I think he got frightened by my crying!  

I know I'm crazy to refuse so don't leave comments telling me I'm stupid. I already know that. There's still that ambitious part of me that's screaming in my head in absolute fury. I know opportunities like this don't come traipsing along every day, and I'll just have to live with this decision for the rest of my life. But now that it's done, my agony is over, my insomnia is cured, my world is again at peace.

Maybe now is not the time. Maybe in the future, something just as big will present itself again. Or maybe this means my time in a glamorous job is nearing its end and I should do something else--something not glamorous at all. Whatever the future holds, I only know that what I choose will always be the one that, in the words of that timeless song, will need all the love I can give, every day of my life for as long as I live.

Of course, I'm still thinking about the money I could've gotten. But I'll just have to make more money some other way. Kindly click on my ads then and buy shoes from me!