TOPAZ HORIZON

Well, this happened:


I am still the answer. Yes.

Anyway! I should've done the first one last February 19, kasi I promised I'd do the "Ask Frances" series on the third Friday of every month. But hindi ako makapili ng question! Hanggang ngayon actually. Ang bibigat ng mga tanong. Nag-iisip tuloy ako na kailangan ko nga humingi ng tulong from someone qualified to help (like a pastor, counselor, financial adviser, psychiatrist, etc!).

But if I did that, then the series should be called "Ask Frances... to Ask an Expert to Help You!" LOL

Joking aside, I'll pick a question for March 18 from the emails I already got. If you want to send a question (yung easy lang please!), email me here frances@topazhorizon.com with "Ask Frances" on the subject. Remember: The chosen question gets a prize!

Happy weekend! Mwah!

I don't dwell on this too much but I sometimes wonder what it feels like to be a mommy and also still have a mommy. Because I now have the hardest job in the world which means I need my Mama more than ever, and I don't have her.


On weekends, I try not to be on Facebook so much. My mom friends are usually visiting their parents or their parents are visiting them. There will be a feast their mom prepared. There will be photos of Lola helping with the baby. There will be piles of Tupperware containers because of course their mom cooked waaaaay too much and she'd tell her daughters to bring home the food and then my friends will all say, "Yey, I don't need to cook anymore. Thanks, mom!" Then there will be photos of my friends with their moms and the kids, all smiling and happy.


And I take a step back, filled with longing for my own mother. I feel envy, but not the envy that makes you wish ill on others. It's an envy that makes me feel sorry for myself. And makes me feel sorry for Mama, too, that she's missing all this. 

My three-year-old boy came up to me carrying a small box of raisins. "Mama, this is for you. I'll put it in your bag so when you get hungry, you can have a snack."


I stared at Iñigo and marveled at his thoughtfulness. "Oh, Iñigo! You love me!"

"Of course I do," he said while stuffing the box of raisins into my handbag. "My brain loves you. My hair loves you. My eyes love you. My tummy loves you. My legs love you."

Then he stopped what he was doing, turned to me with his eyes all big and wide.

"Mama! My whole body loves you! Even my feet! Why?"


"This is a scary feeling. Is there something wrong with me?"

I hugged him super tight and said, "Yeah, love is scary but it's the bestest, biggest, most beautiful feeling in the world!"

And he sat there in my arms then said, "I'm not scared to love you, Mama. And Papa and Vito and baby. I'm brave. I can do it!"

Yes, you can, my darling boy. Yes, you can!