TOPAZ HORIZON

Had tons of plans for this weekend but I woke up yesterday morning with a bad cough, a fever and a headache. I'm monitoring my condition and hoping it isn't that dreaded flu. I feel better now--still coughing but my fever's down and I don't have the other symptoms of A(H1N1) so this must just be a respiratory infection.

I did start thinking about death. Well, since Mama died, I've been pretty obsessed with dying. I told my blogger friend Kaith that I'm prepared to die--I've accepted Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior, told Vince I love him forever and always, I've bought long-term life insurance, all my debts are paid, and all my undies are washed. Yes, I have a fear of leaving my underwear unwashed. This is my mother's fault--she told me a lady should never let herself get caught with dirty undies. True to what she said, before Mama died, she washed all her undies!


Since I don't have a Chanel suit yet, I'm not ready to die yet! Besides, I still have a lot of things to do:

• publish a book or two
• host my own TV show
• see Paris, the Scottish Highlands, New York and Tokyo
• design shoes
• meet Stephen King
• see all of Jan Vermeer's paintings
• grow old with Vince

I do want to say that being prepared to die makes me not afraid of death. I am secure in the knowledge that I'm going to a better place, I'll see Mama again, and I know my loved ones will be taken care of. And finally meeting God is a cool thing to look forward to. I have sooooo many questions to ask Him!

When I talked about my love affair with books, a reader, dear Ranran, asked me this:
Ranran, when I was young, I used to be a lot careful with my books until someone looked at them in their pristine condition and said, "Oh, you collect books as a hobby? When will you read them?"

Since then, I'm the sort who writes on the margins (usually word definitions), underlines favorite passages, dog-ears the pages, punches the paperback covers with my rabbit puncher, reads and rereads them till the covers are curved. I even use the thick books as my pillow on long flights. I also pile them in stacks beside my bed or stash them under the bed when Vince complains of the mess.

I lend books to anyone and everyone. I'm always going around and asking, "Hey, have you read this book? No? Here! Return it when you're done." When I do this, I don't know why people look at me like I'm selling them diet pills. I mean, these are books we're talking about! I want to add that people who read a lot tend to be slim, too, which proves my theory that books are the world's best weight loss product! Oh, and unless the book is a special edition or was a gift, I even give books away! I figure I can always buy a new one.

So, Ranran, I hope I haven't earned your condescension because, yes, my books are tattered. But now they are real.

My friend Kat Dy is one of the fabulous women behind Belle de Jour, the daily planner specially created for Filipinas--it's packed with useful tips and discount coupons on top of the diary designed to make any girl efficient. I own one but I won't show it here because I write stuff on it that's a wee too personal!
A few weeks ago, Kat invited me to give a talk to the BDJ girls. The topic was how to earn money online. I've been earning a few hundred dollars regularly with my online endeavors and Kat thought I should share some of my online money-making secrets. So last Saturday, I squeezed myself into a blue dress and nervously gave my little talk.

I was nervous because of my dress! When you wear something you aren't comfortable in, your discomfort will most definitely show. And if you're about to step in front of a lot of people and talk to them, you want to focus on the talk and not on how your dress is pinching you everywhere! When my hubby saw my photos, he teased, "Ang lusog!" (How plump!") I wasn't offended--at a 111 lbs, I'm underweight, but when we met, I was a mere 90 lbs.--and swatted him playfully on the arm, but I'm glad I was talking about making money not giving diet pill reviews!

I want to say that BDJ girls are smart, good-looking and very friendly and warm! My nervousness melted away when I felt how welcoming (and forgiving!) they were of my fumbling about. I met so many fascinating women that day--entrepreneurs, housewives, wives, mommies who inspired me to do more, more, more! Thanks, BDJ girls! You made me feel better and so I had tons of fun!