Saturday, July 20, 2013

Reader question: Are you really as nice as you portray on your blogs?

Am I nice? Depends on who you ask. If you ask some family members and relatives and people I fired, they'll tell you I'm not nice at all.

I think I'm nicer now. The kids had that effect. You see, if you asked me that question (and with how you actually asked it but I won't post here) a few years ago, I'd tell you off and not very nicely. But I'm mellower now, more patient, nicer... So I decided to have fun and answer your question.

Nice is a word that I'll never use to describe myself. Nice conjures images of simple, sweet girls who smile and obey and not ruffle feathers. Is that the image of me that you see here??? I must be doing something wrong haha. If you actually read the blog, you'll see that I'm not... nice.

But I have a good heart. I am fair and I am just. I will always right a wrong. I will help. I will give. But I tend to have a big mouth and a fiery temper. I will help but if I think you need help because you're an idiot, I will tell you you're an idiot while helping you. I lash out when I'm angry or upset over an injustice. I can't keep quiet and I can't be cool. I have hurt many people with my words and I don't apologize for what I say because I only say things that I mean. That's why I can't possibly be a nice girl.

Still, it's kinda cute people think I'm nice. It's sweet. Maybe there's hope for me yet.


17 comments:

  1. Yes, I think you're not "nice nice", according to some of your readers. I may be a relatively new reader, pero feeling ko gets na kita ng slight. You're brutally honest but not mean. And that's what I like about you. Real. No sugarcoating whatsoever. I remember the first time (hope not the last hehe) I met you in person, I kept on saying ang cute ni Inigo, so then I said "pwera usog". Nakasanayan na kasi. Old school. Hihi. Tapos you said you don't believe in that, that only bad people have usog. If I was only an idiot who has low EQ, I could have felt bad about that but no, I felt okay 'cause you unleashed the real you in front of me. You didn't pretend to be someone else by keeping mum about it and just said thank you. Bet ko yun, Frances. 'Cause somehow, ganun din ako. I only have a few friends now because of my honesty. Pero at least I know yung mga natitira na yun are the real ones. Haba ng comment, I should have blogged about this na lang. Haha!

    But... if people think you're still nice despite your confession that you're not, then that's good. :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oh my! I sound like a bitch! =D

      Seriously, I have a feeling we're the same. An honest life may not attract gazillions of friends but it does invite respect, even if it's a grudging respect =P

      Delete
    2. Hehe. Hindi naman! ;)

      And yes to grudging respect. I have some friends who can't stand my being honest-bordering-to-frank attitude but since they respect me (feeling ko ha!), they are still my friends --- for more than 10 years na! :)

      Delete
  2. This post is actually one of the reason why I follow you. :) Love it.

    ReplyDelete
  3. This is why you are one of my favorite bloggers! Haha!
    Please answer more readers' questions. I am wondering tuloy if this is the same reader who asked if your life was real.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Nice is a whole lot different from being a good person. I'm ok with good people who are not nice. Because sometimes, to be good person, you have to do stuff that aren't "nice". I'd prefer a good person over someone who acts nice because they're afraid to stand up for what they believe in.

    It's easy to be nice. It's difficult to risk being hated for doing the right thing.

    PS I don't like that question. If someone asks me that, I'll feel like I'm being accused of pretending to be someone I'm not.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. If you read pa how she actually phrased the question, she actually was saying I'm not nice at all. I would've gotten mad but instead I laughed because she's right. I'm not nice =) I just wondered why anyone would think I'm pretending to be nice when I've been so honest here about how not nice I am!

      Delete
    2. And, yes, you're right. To be good means having to do things that may upset other people. It's part of living a life of integrity.

      Delete
  5. I actually find your honesty very refreshing. ;-)

    ReplyDelete
  6. When I read your blog, as a Mom, I can sense that you're nice. But when you're a boss, I remember reading one of your blogs when you were looking for a summer job employee, you're very strict and you're very specific with what you were looking for in an employee. You're very transparent, very honest, I may say. :)

    ReplyDelete
  7. Hi Frances,

    Your post, hit me right on my sore spot. You see I'm at a point where some people are trying to sway me to play games/politics. I've always been proud of the fact that like me or hate me, what you see is what you get. If you don't like what I;ve done, tell me so I can do something about it. Otherwise I'll take it that you're a-ok. And like you and some of your other readers, I guess I can bucket myself in the I'm not nice but I'm a good person category... And It's ok. Please keep posting your thoughts. It's really refreshing to read a woman with substance and with conviction. FOr that I really admire you.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes. No games. If that makes us unpopular, then so be it! =)

      Delete
  8. Replies
    1. =) You haven't come over for dinner yet. Ilang taon na naghihintay kami ni Vince O. Teves.

      Delete
  9. I enjoyed reading this post. Kudos on how you answered this not-so-nice question. Shows how intelligent and classy you really are, F! :) I agree that being nice doesn't equate to being a good person. I will never describe myself as nice. Like you, I speak my mind, I'm brutally frank, but my real friends and family love me for that. And I, like many of your readers, love you for your honesty, too. :) I'd say you are not "nicey-nice", but you're a really really good person.:)

    ReplyDelete

Thanks for dropping by my blog! It really means a lot that you spare the time to read... and comment!