I’m a mama of three little boys. Back when they were still tiny babies, I used to dread the day they start running around and getting all sweaty and dirty because I don’t like smelly kids! Well, at 7, 5 and 3 years old, my sons are well past that day. In fact, they spend all day running around, rolling on the floor, jumping about, and chasing each other and their classmates. They get sweaty and they get dirty but they don’t get smelly. Ever!
Kids need to be active (and sweaty) to be healthy.
I like to think it’s genetics (I don’t have body odor) but since they're still kids, the reason simply is they don't have the factors that plague people prone to B.O. Puberty hormones, obesity, regularly eating spicy food, certain medical conditions like diabetes (bacteria like the sugar in their perspiration)—one or all these things can cause body odor. Sweat itself is just water so it doesn’t smell. But bacteria found on our skin just love our sweat and so the more bacteria you have, the smellier you get.
So the solution is really simple—Get rid of bacteria! Baths are important, of course. Fresh clothes at the ready when the boys get sweaty. And I also use antibacterial everything on my kids—their soap, their hand gel, pocket-sized spray bottles of alcohol. Since we can’t prevent sweat, I can just keep bacteria at bay.
My little helpers also love doing the laundry.
I even use antibacterial laundry products! Diba I said my favorite household chore is doing the laundry? Well, ayan, my bacteria-aversion has made me choose products like Ariel AntiBac and Downy AntiBac. I like how it prevents 99% germs from making me and my boys smell yucky. No bacteria, no smell. I’m confident that even when my kids play all day, mabango pa rin sila pag-uwi nila sa bahay. Love it!
P.S. I confess I tried the Parfum Collection lately and my whole family smells sooooo good!
I'm neck-deep in work for my job as beauty editor at L'Oréal, mamas! I have so much to blog about, I know, and I will. Lemme just meet my deadlines first!
So anyway, quick post before I run off again to write beauty articles. So when I write late at night, I need music to help drown out the thick silence, which can get unnerving. I don't know why that happens to me when I work. The quiet never bothers me when I'm reading a book.
But anyway. So I listen to lots of songs but not from iTunes or Spotify. I usually search for a song my Uber driver recommended that day and then I let the auto play take over. This is how even though I am in my 40s, I am not stuck in the songs of my youth (which would be the 80s and 90s—which had the best songs!). That's why I still sing and dance to Justin Bieber, Ariana Grande and why I'm so so so in love with Ed Sheeran.
(sigh)
My current favorite song is "Perfect." I didn't really like it when it first came out, especially the video because he was so friend-zoned it was painful. Of course there is a happy ending to the video (watch it below!) and it took me a few views before I decided I slowly fell in love with the song the way the girl in the video slowly fell in love with Ed.
Anyway, as I was watching that dance at the end, it dawned on me how it's the perfect song to dance to at a wedding. Right??? I'm sure I'm not the first one who thought this and true enough, a quick search produced a dozed wedding dances. Okay, don't even bother looking at those because I already did and they are awkward and painful to watch haha
But this one, mamas... This one is beautiful. Of all the videos of wedding dances to "Perfect," this is not the swankiest wedding, nor the most elegant, and I wish the camera was nicer, but this dance... Oh, it's so sweet.
I keep thinking of Vince when I heard the line, "We were just kids when we fell in love, not knowing what it was." That's so us. Well, I dunno about Vince. He always seemed so sure about me, about us. So I just followed his lead and I'm so glad I did. So glad I did.
In my last post, I talked about how motherhood can help you contribute better to the workforce. I'm happy to say it works both ways, mamas! Your work and the skills you learn on the job will help you as a mommy, too. I should know! For example, my time as a preschool teacher taught me how to deal with kids while my years as an editor-in-chief managing a team on tight deadlines gave me the stamina to manage my household.
If you're afraid your career will make you a bad mama, don't believe it! Yes, a working mama's life can be challenging, but you mustn't let the challenges discourage you. Change how you view the struggle: You can grow not only professionally, but personally as well; you can build essential skills in the workplace that can be transferred to your home, and vice versa. Check out the many ways your work life can be good for your home life:
Management Skills
If you choose a management career, you will be able to transfer your skills to your home life. Project management training will encourage you to look at every plan from different angles, and consider multiple options. This will benefit your home life. You will get better at arranging vacations and childcare, and choosing the most economical ways of commuting to work, or getting your kids to school.
In my case, I never get daunted by parties. While my kids' parties are tiny to begin with (which makes them sooo easy to plan), I've had years of practice as a magazine editor putting together photo shoots, ordering food for staff and crew, attending events, making small talk, making people at ease and even happy.
Iñigo's 3rd birthday party was huge and a success—but won't do that again hehe
Health and Safety
If you get health and safety training at your workplace, or enroll for an online msn degree course, you will understand the importance of exercise and healthy lifestyle better. As a result, you can encourage your kids to exercise regularly and eat healthier. First aid training will help you deal with minor injuries at home, so you don’t have to visit the emergency department every time your child falls off the bike.
For me, it was my work as a mom blogger that helped me be aware of proper food and nutrition at every age, what products are best for my kids's skin (that includes everything from allergenic skincare products to the best diapers like Pampers), vaccinations, and other safety concerns. Why? Because I had client brands who wanted me to write about these things and many times I had to research and there were also times these brands sent me pages upon pages of scientific data.
You won't believe all the research papers I read for this campaign!
Financial Planning
Working will also make you better at financial planning. You can transfer your skills to your household budget and manage your money better. Money management is an essential skill, but it is, unfortunately, not taught in mainstream education. This means that working moms are generally better at budgeting, planning for larger expenses, and staying out of financial troubles. You will be able to make your family budget go further if you pay attention to how your employer controls costs.
I became good at budgets when I was a managing editor. Even I was surprised at how adept I was at making sure we made a magazine within budget, that all bills and suppliers were paid on time, and that we still had a quality product—even on a budget! Sadly, I'm not as good with this financial planning when it comes to my household. I mean, I'm good but not super good. I like spoiling my kids, you see, so that can be a problem especially when I'm trying to stick to a budget but "Mama, can we eat Bonchon pleeeeeease?" unravels my resolve!
Time Management
You will be forced to improve your work-life balance while looking after your family and going to your workplace. You will learn how to compare routes to your workplace and to your kids’ school, avoid traffic, and stick to appointments. While you might not have been good at keeping time while you were at home with your kids, now it will be something you need to do every day to keep your job.
Am I right, mamas? Sometimes when people with no children talk about being busy, I sigh. In the immortal words of Iñigo Montoya from The Princess Bride...
I've been an underling and I've been a boss. I'm a businesswoman, too. I've worked for 48 hours straight but sleepless nights were easy when I didn't have kids. Let me tell ya—nothing compares to the busy-ness of a mama! But now I'm more efficient. My 24 hours is so precious that I've learned how to manage my time ruthlessly. What used to take me 14 hours to do, I can now squeeze into 6 hours. My focus is razor-sharp because I can't afford to waste time anymore. Motherhood has taught me the quickest, most efficient way to do things!
Managing Kids and Difficult Situations
When you work with people from different walks of life, you will gradually learn how to handle difficult colleagues and clients. This skill will come handy when your kids start, well, talking. My goodness, I thought I was such an amazing mother until my kids started learning how to talk and got sassy with me. Things like, "Because I said so!" just won't do it, mamas. Am I right? I had to draw on all my learned skills as a manager and negotiator to deal with my own children! I seriously can't imagine the teenage years.
While being a mother and having a job can be challenging, you need to look at the bright side. Some of your parenting and homemaking skills can be transferred to the world of employment, and vice versa. Make the best use of your skills and experience gained at home and in the workplace, and you can be a better mother and employee. Good luck to us all, working mamas! We got this!
Being a mom and having a career are two things that are often pitted against each other. Mothers can't be good at work because they're distracted by their children. Working women can't be good mothers because they're not the ones raising their kids 24/7. Time and again, we working mamas have proven these accusations as false. Many businesses are founded by women (shout out to my friends who are all businesswomen!). Many businesses have senior officers who are women (check out this 2017 PDI article: More women executives in PH, Asia pacific, but...). Many of these career women are also mothers and I celebrate how women can enjoy more aspects of womanhood—of life!—and this is truly a sign of changing times.
The three reasons I work so hard.
I will admit that juggling motherhood and career and marriage and self-care is a huge struggle. And I will also say that when the need arises, family always comes first. That's a no-brainer. I work because I love it, I love making my own money, I love providing for my family, and I love using parts of my brain for something else that doesn't involve children. I like being more than a mommy. That said, when the kids are sick, I drop all work. When a job offer of P200,000 a month came up but it would mean working practically 24/7, I declined. You can always make money but when family needs you, family comes first. I think most working moms know this and do this.
But that doesn't make mommies bad workers. In my experience, I have more to bring to the table now because of all the things I know as a mom. I'm better at understanding how finances work, for example, now that I have to manage a household. I'm now more organized. I can make the best decisions in a snap (trained by kids whose needs are always urgent!).
Becoming a mother can give your career a boost in many ways. Motherhood and career don’t have to be mutually exclusive. So if you’re thinking about work after having children, or are yet to have children and wonder how you can make it work, then this post is for you. Here are some of the ways that becoming a mom can give your career the boost that it might need.
You FINALLY take that leap of faith.
Many women put off doing what they really want because they don't think they can make it. But when children are in the picture, you start to think of being a good example. How can you teach your children to be true to themselves, to chase after their dreams, to pursue their passions, and be proud of their talents if you yourself aren't fulfilling your own purpose in life? If you've always wanted to be a teacher, do it now. If you've always wanted to bake cookies and sell them, do it now. Nothing is sadder for a child to see than a regretful parent who says, "I always wanted to do this-and-that but I couldn't because I had to work for you kids/scared I'd fail/I didn't want to be laughed at/etc." I know because my own parents said that and it is heart-wrenching to witness wasted lives, buried talents, and crushed dreams, especially if those were your parents'.
Be the role model you want your kids to have! If you fail, then try again. At least your kids see that you were brave enough to live your truth, tried to make it work, and got up again. I really do believe this because that's what my husband and I do all the time. Making our dreams come true requires a leap of faith, yes. It took me a while to take that leap, I'll admit, and I was scared all the time. I'm still scared. But many mom bosses (like many of my friends) decided to leave their old career behind and carve out a new one for themselves—and they inspired me!
You’re motivated for real success.
If you weren’t too motivated by your career beforehand, then it is important to note that becoming a parent can really give you the motivation that you need. Nothing motivates you more than the little ones that you have at home that need to be fed and cared for. I was interviewed for an article in a parenting magazine a few years ago and one of the questions was, "What motivates you to work?" And I replied, "The bills. Do you realize how expensive it is to raise kids???" Haha but it's true. I can get really lazy, you know, but those bills need to be paid, those kids need to be fed, those kids need to go to school, wear clothes, get their vaccines. So I can't ever be lazy!
Money issues aside, you also become more focused and determined to be a success because you want your kids to be proud of you. My son, Vito, is so funny. He brought a magazine to school because my photo was in it (it was the Biogenic ad) and he told his classmates and their moms: "Look at my mama! She's a model!" I was half-embarrassed and half-proud. I loved it that he was so proud of me! It made me want to work harder, you know? I'm sure you know what I mean, mamas.
Your skills improve.
Like I mentioned earlier, motherhood forces you to learn a lot of new skills that you didn't have before. It teaches you creativity, patience, razor-sharp decision-making, people management, mastery of juggling schedules, and a whole lot more. Many moms actually realize that they could capitalize on these new skills. I know many women who embarked on businesses like home organization, house-cleaning, virtual assistance, events management, catering, tutoring, kiddie fashion, baby products.
If you're a mom who quit work to be with your kids, or you've found yourself having plenty of time now that the kids are in school, you may want to attend workshops or enroll in courses that can equip you to launch that business you always wanted to do. If you're employed, you may consider a masters degree to improve your skills and employability. Doing an MSW online, for example, could open up your career options and make you able to apply for that promotion that you’ve always wanted to do.
You're more powerful now, oh so much more powerful!
As a working mom, you have a lot of things to be thinking about. And becoming a mom will automatically make you better able to manage time, prioritize, and organize. So even if you go back to your previous career after having children, it can mean that you’re better able to do the job you were doing before. You’re likely to be a much more productive worker as you know you have only got a certain amount of time to get the work done in.
Becoming a mother can give your confidence a boost. You have done something amazing when you grew a baby and kept that baby alive and healthy, too! For many women it can help them to feel more confident and comfortable in their own skin. It happened to me and I wrote about my empowerment because I truly felt more alive and more powerful. Your motherhood can be just the catalyst that you need for a mighty change!
It's Chinese New Year tomorrow! For many Fil-Chinese schools and businesses, that means it's a holiday so hello long weekend!
If you’ve decided to spend the weekend on a family getaway, then don't panic, mamas. While a long break sounds like a brilliant way to relax – nothing can beat the excitement of a last minute holiday, right? – it doesn’t mean that you can leave the success of your break to chance. You still need to pack efficiently. In fact, you need to be twice as efficient than you normally are during your holiday preps because a last minute plan doesn’t leave you much time to get ready. So what do you need to pack in your luggage to make it work for you and your family
Transitional clothes for both warm and cold kinds of weather
When you don’t have the time to study the weather, you need to prepare for cold and warm temperatures. Be reassured: it doesn’t mean that you should pour the entire contents of your wardrobe in your travel bag.
Whether you're going to the beach or going on staycation in a posh hotel, make sure to bring midseason jackets for your family, as they’re ideal to keep you warm during a cool and windy day but they’re not too heavy so that you can still wear them when the sun is out. My husband always packs jackets for my kids (because I always forget, given our tropical climate). Why? Because when we go on long road trips, the car gets cold. When we book at a hotel, the A/C gets really freezing (even when I turn it off!). When we went to sunny Bohol and climbed the Chocolate Hills, guess what—it was windy and drizzly and chilly up there!
Just remember the onion skin layer concept. Pack clothes that you can layer on top of each other if you need to: T-shirt, light jumper, cardigan, etc.
We left the hotel, it was hot and sunny. Thirty minutes later at Chocolate Hills, we were freezing!
The entertainment factor
It’s a holiday, however short it is. Consequently, it has to be fun! If you’ve still got enough time, make sure to book some tickets for local attractions and shows. Whenever we go to Tagaytay, for example, I really make kulit my husband to go to Tagaytay Sky Ranch and the zoo at Residence Inn. He hates those places haha but the kids love them!
Additionally, make sure to pack a few toys to keep the kids occupied during the journey. While you don’t need to throw all their toys in a bag, you should have at least three different kinds of games such as a soft toy, a colouring book, and a board game, for example. I allow my boys to bring one toy each. More than the entertainment factor, their toy comforts them in a strange place.
While boating in Burnham Park is something we won't do again, I'm glad we still got to do it!
Essential tech devices
Back in my day, there was no such thing as gadgets. Now we have a small bag just for it! We bring the iPad. It keeps the kids from running all over the airport or the hotel lobby when we're preoccupied with checking in. We bring a camera. We have chargers and wires and power banks. If we're traveling abroad, we bring a universal plug.
One thing I really want is a smart suitcase that has an inbuilt GPS system. Have you seen those? This suitcase makes sure you'll never lose your luggage. Suitcases now are so hi-tech actually. They have built-in chargers, built-in child seats, and some bags even follow you around like a puppy. This last one I think is stupid because people will trip over that darned thing, diba??? Just look at it.
Looks cool, though.
Don’t forget a snack!
If your trip is going to last a few hours, you’d better pack some yummy snacks to keep you going. Best to pack your own chips and cookies, too, because those things are so expensive at tourist spots! You can also make your own healthy snacks in a moment. Popcorn is universally loved and it's low in calories (unless you add tons of salt and butter). Not a fan of popcorn? Try homemade power bars instead. They’re full of superfoods and don’t require any baking time, so they’re ready in no time.
But we make sure to buy the local snacks, like ube halaya and strawberry jam from Baguio.
From appropriate clothes to something to eat on the way, it’s important to know what to pack when you’re in a hurry. Don’t let your last-minute holiday be ruined by poor packing and do enjoy the long weekend!
Hallooo halloooo! I know I've been away. Now that my kids are older and the first two boys are in big school and the youngest has weaned and can mostly be left to his own devices, I have found the most incredible and most wonderful amazing thing: I CAN READ BOOKS AGAIN!
I'm so happy!
That means I've neglected the blog, though. I've tried being more active on the Topaz Horizon Blog Facebook page and thanks so much for making it a fun community. I love how we can all chat together on Facebook.
So anyway! I didn't notice it but it seems I've really been enjoying the past year. Without me realizing it, I finally found time last year to shower for more than 5 minutes, to eat without rushing, to pee without the door open, to poop without panicking. I now have time to do my skin care morning and night (a huge reason for my improved skin condition, if I may say so myself!). I can even exercise a little! And in the last few months, I found that I even now have time to read! I read four of the Dark Tower novels in a month and I'm finishing the fifth—the conclusion of Stephen King's magnum opus! —this week. I am having a lovely time just drowning in words. It's been such a lovely reunion!
These are Books 3-7. Been in bed with my books! So happy!
Let me share some of my favorite quotes:
"Dead was the gift that kept on giving. Dead, like diamonds, was forever." "In the Land of Memory, the time is always now." "She understands how being afraid all the time makes one's friends more precious; how it makes every bite of every meal sweet; how it stretches time until every day seems to last forever, leading on to velvet night..." "'If'... [is] the only word a thousand letters long." "Head clear. Mouth shut. See much. Say little." "Never whisper for the wind unless you want it to blow."
There's more. So much more! As you can see from the quotes above, the Dark Tower novels are not happy stories. I am grieving now actually and I haven't even finished it. So much death and horror! So much love and duty, too.
I was actually planning on NOT blogging this month. What time I find after family, work, and the chores, I want to spend with my nose in a novel. But I had promised myself to blog every Monday and Thursday so I have blog posts my Loyal Readers can comment on because I have my Commenter of the Month giveaway. Must not neglect that!
Speaking of skin care, I also just took photos of new skin care products you might like to try out this year (maybe I should give one of the sets away to my February Commenter of the Month!). I'm also finally finishing my birthday post—yes, my birthday was 2 months ago hehe but I haven't finished the post yet. Too many things to be thankful for! I also want to share with you my thoughts on the #MeToo movement and how we, as mothers, should be propelled by it to make sure we raise girls and boys who will be respectful of each other, not abusive. Things like that!
Anyway. I know there are tons of amazing, entertaining and gorgeous mommy blogs out there. So happy to see so many moms are sharing about their lives. (I'll tell you my favorite ones soon! Would you like that?) I just wanted to say that even though there are many other better mom blogs, you still stick around and that moves me. Thank you!
Okay, I'll come back tomorrow with a guest post on weddings. Because it's Valentine's Day and we should have a post about love! Meanwhile, I hope you all have a great day and a wonderful week doing what you love, whether it's watching your favorite Netflix show or reading your beloved books.
Business mogul Kylie Jenner finally announced she gave birth to a baby girl, confirming pregnancy rumors. She said she wanted the whole experience to be private while she was going through it, and she apologized for keeping it private when she'd always been so public about her life.
While I don't think she should be sorry, I totally understand why she apologized to her fans. Yes, it's her life, her pregnancy, her decisions. Hindi naman kailangan lahat i-reveal. I feel like because she saw her older sisters so publicly pregnant and she witnessed all the hate with the love, it's so understandable that she'd keep her own pregnancy to herself. What do you think, mamas?
Kayo, how did you feel about your pregnancies? Super public every day ba ang updates? Or immediate family lang ang may alam? Why was that so?
Me, my first two pregnancies talagang super share ako with everything. But my third one, hindi na masyado. By then kasi alam ko na that when you put yourself out there, maraming unwanted comments. Like, nagpost ka ng may hawak ka na Coke and someone will comment, "Mommy, linalason mo na yung baby mo." Or may photo ako na kasama yung first two kids ko and may magsasabi ng "Grabe you're pregnant every year do you even care about your carbon footprint?!" So nakakawalang gana mag-share, you know? In fact, that's one of the major reasons I turned my blog from a mommy journal documenting my motherhood journey and my kids' lives to a working mom's blog so I can talk about career and home, and my kids can have their privacy. Yes, all photos and stories shared now are with my boys' permission. And most of the time they say no. Kaya kung napansin niyo, parang naging beauty blog na ang Topaz Horizon haha
But if you notice other mom bloggers, they also evolve. Or kill their blogs entirely. From mom blogs, nagiging cooking blogs or DIY home stuff or kiddie arts and crafts ideas, or they evolve to brands selling products for moms, kids and the home (my dream!). Kasi when the kids start having a sense of social media and privacy, the moms will have then realized they can't just blog/IG about their kids anymore. There are security reasons to consider, too. I have never said where my kids go to school, for example, although people have guessed. Also, many schools discourage a social media presence for their students so paano na mga mom-and-me OOTDs??? So, if you're a mom blogger with babies, know that your blog has maybe 5 years. Unless you keep making babies and grabe na yun hahahahahaha
But anyway, balik sa topic of my third pregnancy. I want to acknowledge that I had many blog readers who also sent me messages asking why I wasn't so generous about sharing my third baby. They said they're so happy for me, they love my third baby also, that they're disappointed wala masyadong updates or pictures. So to you, I'm so sorry that I kept my Piero all to myself and yet thanks so much for the love!
Naaaaaaks, na-inspire talaga ako kay Kylie! Actually, I just recalled that time when I also didn't want to talk about my third baby but kinda had to because I had sponsors or because readers asked. So sobrang bilib ako kay Kylie because she put her foot down. She decided that in this special case, her sponsors, her family's reality show, and her fans didn't matter. Her privacy and her baby did. And in this age of super public motherhood, that's amazing. I am truly inspired!
Check out Kylie's pregnancy video:
What I loved:
Kendall telling Kylie to pose better.
1. I love it that the video doesn't allow ads or comments. As I type, it's already at 19,900,000+ views. In 10 hours! If she had allowed ads, she'd have earned a lot na. But she didn't allow it. RESPECT!
Mama Kylie showing off her bump and her bling.
2. I loved how she's so sure and calm about everything. She's 20 years old, yes, but if you're 20 and have a business worth USD 420 million - your own business, not inherited or married to - then you are more mature than most 20-year-old kids.
Kylie with her nieces and siblings.
3. I loved how her family is so supportive. Her mom, Kris Jenner, was absolutely certain Kylie would be the best mom ever. Kim K gently and humorously wanted to warn her about what will happen to her vagina (such a sisterly thing!). Khloe was excited she and Kylie were pregnant at the same time. Aww, makes me wish I was surrounded by pregnant family and friends when I was also preggy (I didn't because I got married late and had kids even later while my friends had kids in their late teens and early 20s). It just seems such a womanly tribal thing. I never had that!
With her friends at her baby shower.
4. I loved how she celebrated her pregnancy with her friends, with lots of food, with parties—she's just so obviously happy! And then when it mattered, she didn't reveal anything—we didn't see her giving birth, we just heard it. We still don't know her baby's name. And we never heard anything from her, her man, her family or her friends when she was pregnant—all 9 months of it and even on the day she gave birth. Nothing. I love how she's so in control of everything.
Kylie and baby daddy Travis Scott at the doctor's clinic.
5. I loved all the hospital scenes haha The ultrasound, the heartbeat, the family all around her at her prenatal check-ups and when she gave birth (I didn't have that huhu). I seriously cried when I heard her baby's first cry. Brought me back to my own birthing and how giving birth trumps all experiences. Nothing, absolutely NOTHING, comes close to that amazing experience. And I'm so lucky I got to go through it three times.
Congratulations, Kylie! You'll be an amazing mama! And a working mama, too!
When a new year dawns, most of us think of making changes. One of those changes probably involve a career shift. I know this because I've been seeing resolutions on my Facebook friends' updates and many of them talk about starting a business or hoping to work abroad or even to work from home.
This is understandable. I think that when faced daily with the terrible Manila traffic, the worsening political climate, and the changes caused by technology, people are wondering, "What's my next move?" To me especially and to people like me who are from media (print and online), we're always dreading if this is the year we go hungry.
If you are not getting enough job satisfaction or recognition, or you are worried that your company or entire industry is going to disappear in a few years’ time, you might want to change before it is too late. That's what I did years ago when magazines started dying off—I focused more on my blog even before my own title was killed. That way, when the magazine shuttered, I had actually already started another career online and so I wasn't so annihilated.
No matter if you want to start a new career, or a business, it is important that you complete a reality check, and you are aware of the risks and challenges ahead. Find out more about what you should be asking yourself before making a final decision.
1. Are you ready to learn?
To enter a new work environment coming from a different industry, you are likely to have to complete some kind of training. No matter if your new job doesn’t require a degree, you will still need to learn. For me back in 2010, when I decided to focus on blogging, I did a ton of research on how other successful bloggers were doing it. I read up on all the blogging tips I could find. I asked established bloggers for their secrets—not all were helpful haha that's why I promised myself I'll always give blogging tips and do blogging workshops!
Now, if you're looking for another career that's not blogging, that's okay. Maybe you can ask your company if they offer on-the-job training and say you're expanding your skills set. You can also check out if your company (or another company!) will pay for your education in case you want to get extra training or a master's degree. Some people who want to go abroad train for an entirely new career altogether. I know nurses are paid well in the US, for example. Getting a family nurse practitioner degree can take a few years, but will pay off long term. You will, however, need to be committed to studying new subjects you are not familiar with.
2. Can you afford a new career?
If you need a degree or accredited qualification to do a new job, you need to find out two important things: how much it will cost, and if you can fit in learning in your current schedule. To be honest, I had thought of taking classes in marketing and public relations in the digital age. I looked at Coursera and there were lots of free classes offered. Why did I think this? Well, around two years ago, I was told that advertisers now prefer Instagram and vlogs. I'm a words person, not a visual or video person so I knew I couldn't compete. I don't want a massive following from pictures or videos. I want people to follow me because of what I write. So I thought maybe it's time to shift to a career in digital marketing.
Here was my problem: With babies and a blogging business, I just couldn't find the time to study again. Thankfully, I was able to find my job as beauty editor at L'Oréal. I don't know if this job will be mine 20 years from now or even next year, however, so maybe I should start learning something new!
So there: Think of the money involved in taking up a new career. If it's the same industry but in another part of the city, think of the transport costs. If you aim for a more prestigious position, will the extra hours spent in the office be worth it? Mothers find it hard to balance family and work life, so if you have small children, you might not have enough time to study, for example, not to mention the financial side of education, travel, and taking time off. If that's the case, maybe you should stay put first in your job and wait it out.
3. What are your career chances?
Before you decide on changing your career, maybe you should read industry growth predictions, to make sure that you will have a job 10 years from now. If you're dreaming of becoming a magazine editor, I hate to break it to you but it's not going to happen anymore. A moment of silence please for magazines.
It's not just print media that's in trouble. Some jobs are likely to disappear, due to the development of information technology and artificial intelligence. For example, the accounting of my business is currently handled by both Pinnacle Sources and Taxumo. Pinnacle does my business permit renewal and other things that involve talking to the government; Taxumo does the automatic payment of my taxes. Thing is Taxumo is adding more to their menu of services, and that means I'll let go of Pinnacle Sources in two years, maybe as early as this year.
Some processes in different industries are going to be completed by robots, and you don’t want to end up being redundant after a few years, due to industry and technology changes. Build transferable skills, such as management, communication, languages, and so on, so you can change your career path when needed.
So before taking a leap into another company, check the jobs currently advertised, the benefits, salaries, and career progression opportunities. You might want to have a chat with some of your friends who work in the sector and ask them about their experiences, so you don’t end up disappointed.
4. Will you enjoy your work?
Chances are you would like to change your career because your job satisfaction level is low. You absolutely must make sure that you will enjoy your new vocation, and you will find continuous challenge and learning opportunities, as well as recognition.
If you find yourself fascinated by programmers that work behind what people see in the internet, you can enroll for courses that will enhance your logical and coding skills. This will eventually open opportunities for you as you start to find a software engineering job.
This doesn't have to mean bigger pay, funnily enough. A lot of us moms are okay with smaller pay if it means having more time with our kids or not having to go through traffic every day, or if there are other benefits like traveling opportunities with the kids. Sometimes, we'll be happier if we start a business or leave the city and start a farm. Some of us want to do meaningful work—usually with no pay. Or maybe some of us moms will be happier if we decide to NOT work and be a housewife. No shame in that!
Good luck, mamas! Happy new year and may this be the year your career dreams come true!
I have found the lipstick of our dreams, working mamas! Last week, I was able to get all 10 shades of the Maybelline SuperStay Matte Ink Liquid Lipsticks. I love all the shades since they're all wearable. And by wearable, I don't just mean the colors look great on everyone and for daily use; I also mean the wear super stays put all day long.
It's my best beauty find of the year and I know it's only January but I'm really in love with these lipsticks!
Okay, so the Maybelline Super Stay Matte Ink Liquid Lipsticks were launched in the US last year and now it’s finally here in the Philippines!
The Matte Ink Liquid lipstick comes in a tube with the best kind of applicator—a diamond-shaped sponge with a hole in the middle so that it grabs a lot of product and then makes it so easy to apply. That said, you don't really need a lot because it's so pigmented.
The texture is creamy and takes a while to dry, but when it does, you never need to worry about reapplying because what you put in the morning is enough to last you the whole day. No transfer, no fading, no nothing anymore!
When they slapped Super Stay on the label, they meant it. My lipstick survived a lunch of greasy burgers and fries, kissing my kiddos, making out with my husband, snacks and dinner, and even a nap and I woke up and my lipstick didn't stain the pillow at all!
The lipstick isn't drying at all. It's best to exfoliate your lips first before application because when it dries to a semi-matte finish, crusty lips will be exaggerated.
Look at that burger, mamas. No hint of lipstick at all. Amazing! The lipstick will stay put all day, like I said, because they are that permanent. I don't know if all the shades are like that (I didn't test the dark ones) but I feel confident that all the shades will stay put. In fact, even when I wiped my lips vigorously with a napkin after eating, the lipstick didn't transfer at all. In the evening, I really had to use an oil-based makeup remover to wipe off the Matte Ink.
Check out screencaps of my IG Stories when I tested Matte Ink last weekend. I got so many DMs because of this asking me to reveal the mystery lipstick! Well, I'm wearing the Lover shade of the Matte Ink line and I LOVE IT!
Anyway, watch this!
My favorites are Loyalist, Lover (my absolute must-have!), Pioneer, and Voyager. But I'm planning to buy more if and when the other nude shades come to our shores.
These lipsticks ara available on Lazada now. GET THEM ALL! In fact, as I type this, my lipsticks from Lazada just arrived. Too a while. I ordered them Sunday morning and they arrived 4 days later. Anyway! This is not a sponsored post. I didn't even get any free lipsticks. I just got to try them for my job (I'm a beauty editor at L'Oréal Paris) and once I tried it, I just knew I had to share my fantabulous find with you! Buy now!
It's January and that means it's time for me to renew my business permit. It's no joke starting and maintaining a business in this country. It seems like the government hates businesses, what with all the hardships and documents and fees and taxes to pay every single month for as long as the business is up. It's also no joke closing a business here because to do so is quite expensive and such a painfully long drawn out process.
So yes, I sometimes regret starting a business but because my business has allowed me to work with huge brands like Smart and L'Oréal Paris, I really can't regret it. I didn't want to be small-time. I wanted the big guns and so I had to open a writing business. It's thriving and providing for my family so even though I hate all government transactions, I am willing to go through all the hoops required.
Unless, of course, someone else will do it for me!
Because I am always on the look out for things that will make my life easier, I have found that hiring professional accountants from a reputable company is the best way to make my businesswoman experience better. Emphasis on "professional" and "reputable" because I hired an accountant before and he was unreliable and I am still dealing with the mess he left.
I'm so grateful for Pinnacle Sources Global Consultancy Inc. They are a team of qualified accountants who provide end-to-end business solutions for start-ups. They will handle everything from business registration, HR and recruitment to all the nitty-gritty of accounting services that streamline a business’ accounting tasks to help us reduce costs and maximize profits. Through a team of skilled Certified Public Accountants, Pinnacle Sources will not only keep track of expenses but help the business create and manage budgets, forecast future revenue and track the financial health of the business.
For me, Pinnacle is more than a service. They are so kind and patient with me especially when I'm so stupid and just can't understand all the hows and whys of what the government requires. Even when I've lost my resolve and given in to despair, they encourage me. Even when I am so ashamed and say, "I don't have money now," they tell me what we can do. They are more than professional. They care.
If you're a business looking for accounting services, if you're just starting out and need a professional accountant to manage your bookkeeping and taxes, you must give Pinnacle Sources a call. You will not be disappointed. They will really take care of you. I think they're one of my best finds as a businesswoman. Because of them, I don't regret starting a business anymore. In fact, they've made me believe I'm doing a good job. Thanks, Pinnacle!
Anyway, if you're still hemming and hawing about hiring a professional accountant like Pinnacle Sources, let me share with you what they told me which convinced me to hire them:
A qualified team of accountants will not only keep your books in order; they can help your business save by offering cost-efficient spending solutions or even help your business earn by helping you make accurate financial forecasts.
Yet for businesses that are just starting out, it can be difficult to allocate time and resources for accounting personnel as you focus on getting your company off the ground. That is why for small to medium enterprises or new business owners, outsourcing is a viable solution to fulfilling your accounting needs. Here’s a closer look at the specific advantages outsourcing your accounting:
Financial Savings
Money can be tight when your business is just starting out. By outsourcing your accounting, you can pay for the specific accounting services you require without incurring the additional cost of hiring an employee. This will help you save on expenses like benefits and insurance and also on work space, office furniture, computer and software that you may not be able to afford just yet.
Outsourcing your accounting also gives you more flexibility in terms of scale. Whether you are looking to grow your business or suddenly have to cut back, you have a team who can help provide different plans and options to achieve your goals, which in-house accounting can’t provide.
Time Savings
Think of the weekly hours it will take to manage in-house accounting staff—taking away from the time you can spend on business. Outsourcing your business’s bookkeeping operations frees up valuable time that can be put into better use for the company, such as improving your operations, product or marketing. Entrepreneurs also don’t have to deal with the typical headaches involved with recruiting, hiring, retaining and overseeing staff because that’s what the outsource service provider will handle.
Expert Services
Outsourcing gives you a great way to have full-time knowledge on your team without having to pay for it around the clock. By putting your books into the hands of highly skilled staff who understand the best practices, your job becomes a whole lot easier—and efficient. Accounting service providers also have to constantly hone their skills to keep up with the competition, ever increasing the quality of their work. This means when you go to an accounting service firm, you can trust that your accounting will be handled well.
Access to top systems
Outsourcing your accounting operations gives you more access to the top tools in the industry. Most businesses can’t afford to pay for the extremely expensive bookkeeping programs nor can they afford to spend the time keeping up with changing laws and regulations. By outsourcing, you’re essentially purchasing those tools and that knowledge by proxy. In addition, these top systems create nightly backups and keep organized records and books for years, ensuring that you will have access to reports and will always be ready should an audit be required.
Contractual Obligation
Accounting service providers face higher liability than in-house staff, which makes them less of a risk for your business—they’re more likely to follow through on their obligations because they have more to lose if they don’t. Furthermore, dealing with the contracts or agreements of outside providers can be much easier than dealing with the hiring negotiations, employee management and other human resources issues involved with employees.
One of the companies who offer outsourced accounting services is Pinnacle Sources
“Accounting is something that every business needs whether it is small or large. When you outsource your accounting services to us, you are assured of a team of Certified Public accountants that will help you make better financial decisions that will grow your business,” said Pinnacle Sources’ Managing Director Christine Li.
To find out more about Pinnacle Sources and their services, visit their website, http://www.pinnaclesources.com/ or their office at 32/F BPI-Philam Bldg, Ayala Ave., Makati. You can also send them an email: ask@pinnaclesources.com.
It's the new year and you know what I'm so excited about? People telling me my skin looks so good! You can't imagine how happy that makes me feel and I'm here to tell you that the Flawless Rejuvelite Acne Control facial is giving me that glow. Literally a glowing facial, mamas! Look at the mask Flawless uses on me:
Look at it glooooow!
There are four Rejuvelite Mask facials Flawless offers: Oil Control, Acne Control, Age Defy, and Whitening. Each facial uses a different kind of LED light energy to address your specific skin concern. Since mine has always been controlling my acne, that's what I tried.
To be very honest, I was skeptical about this facial. I mean, light can cure my acne? Get out of here. But I read up on it, read dozens of reviews from happy beauty bloggers and credible beauty editors, even looked up scientific papers on LED therapy (check out my research here), and so I gave it a go.
The Flawless Rejuvelite Acne Control Mask Facial is a full treatment that will take about 2 hours. It starts with cleansing, steaming and pricking and then the cold Oxygenating mask is applied to my face for 15 minutes.
Here comes the LED mask part. For my skin concern, blue light was used for me. Blue light kills pimple-causing bacteria and calms and soothes inflammation. I'll have to admit that I lay under that blue light-emitting mask, I was still a doubter. I guess I was so used to physical manipulation that to just lie quietly under light was unnerving.
After 15 minutes of my LED light therapy, I was free to go. I didn't notice anything different right after (maybe because it was dinner time and I was hungry) but I woke up the next day looking glowwy. Yep! I looked great. I thought, "Nah, it's just the usual facial."
But when I had that glow even after two weeks, and then the few pimples I had calmed down and disappeared and no new eruptions occurred even a month after my facial, I was convinced! I am now a LED light therapy enthusiast! I highly recommend it and if you should ever try a facial this year, mamas, the Flawless Rejuvelite Mask Facials are a must!
Every subsequent Rejuvelite facial I got made me even more smooth and young and glowing. Look at me now (this is just my phone camera):
The Flawless Rejuvelite Mask Facial is P1,100. There is a faster and more affordable option, the Flawless Rejuvelite InstaFacials (Calming, Boosting, Healing, and Firming). Each is only 30 minutes long and just P480. That's what I want to do next!
From the oily, pimply woman I've resigned myself to look like forever, I now look so much younger and better because of my glowing skin! Thank you so much, Flawless!!! Thanks so much for sponsoring my blog and my skincare last year, thank you for believing there was a beautiful woman under all those pimples and scars and wrinkles, and thank you for convincing me that beauty inside and outside can co-exist and be a wonderful thing.
I'm so happy my skin is so much better. I feel a new confidence and, now more than ever, I can't wait to conquer 2018!
I've been a working mama for more than 7 years. I can't see myself not being one, to be honest. I enjoy working. Sometimes I dream of taking a long break—maybe 6 months to a year of just being a housewife and see if I take to it, you know? But I like it that there's a part of my life that is separate from motherhood. I know a lot of moms work because they have to provide for their family. That's one of my biggest reasons for working, too. But I'm also lucky to actually enjoy what I do. I don't enjoy deadlines and enduring the traffic and staying up late at night writing, but I've adjusted my attitude towards the unpleasant parts of my career so that I can continue appreciating the work that puts food on my table and my sons in a good school.
From 2013 to this day, my constant work companions: my kids, their toys, my coffee.
You see, that's the dilemma that many working mothers face. You need to work but you also want to be with your kids. You love your job but you feel crushing guilt when you're missing family time. You want to have it all but when you're just too exhausted, then is it all worth it? Well, after 7 years of triumphs and failures, I have a few thoughts on how to make this work-life balance work.
First things first: There's no such thing as work-life balance. The sooner you get that into your head and accept it, the happier you'll be!
Balance means everything is equal. That means literally giving everything the same amount of time and energy. Let's divide your 24 hours, mama. You need to be a wife, a mom, a career woman, a friend, a homemaker, and yourself. You need to sleep, too. That would mean 3 hours being with your husband, 3 hours with your kids, 3 hours at your job, 3 hours having lunch with friends, 3 hours cleaning the house, 3 hours at the spa, and 3 hours of sleep. Plus at least 3 hours in traffic, of course. Sounds ridiculous.
What you just need to know is everything has a time. It's time for lunch, then eat. It's time to sleep, then sleep. It's time to work, then work. It's time to go home and have dinner with your family, then for heaven's sake go home and eat dinner with your family, put the kids to bed, and spend some time with your husband. Easier said than done, I know. I'm still figuring it out myself because once I get a schedule working, my life changes—kids suddenly don't have classes, husband has a new job, my deadlines suddenly moved earlier—and so I have to re-organize and re-prioritize. It's constant juggling!
Huge perk of bringing my kids to work: Celebrities I interview warm up to me fast!
I've learned a few things about keeping this working mama life enjoyable, though. Here are five and I hope they help you:
1. Don't multi-task.
So how to juggle? I don't believe in multi-tasking, mamas. I believe in focusing at what or who is on front of you. Yes, that's my first tip. Focus on the task or the person in front of you, take care of it, then move on to the next. When you're running all over the house, answering emails while cooking lunch and changing diapers, you won't feel in charge, you'll feel like a disaster. So focus focus focus!
2. Make a family schedule.
A family calendar is a must for every busy family and is especially useful for family groups where a parent has returned to work or school. No more forgotten appointments or inability to organize family time or date night. There are plenty of calendar apps available for download, some for free. I'm a bullet journalist. Yep, nothing like pen and planner! My husband has a white board calendar on the back of our bedroom door.
I'm the social calendar keeper in my home—pedia check-ups, play dates, kiddie parties, family visits. My husband takes care of the financial calendar—when bills are due, when they're paid, what checks are expected. I've now put a calendar in my kids' room, too, so they're aware of important dates. It's really helped everyone stay on top of (instead of buried under) their lives! 3. Ask for help.
This I know for sure. Everyone calls me a supermom because I have three little boys, juggling many jobs, and no household help. Let me tell you something—I feel like a failure most of the time! And I also realized one thing: I earned more and was happier when I had household help. My life now is not impossible because I'm obviously making it work, but is it easy? Nope.
Spare time for working mamas, if can even you find spare time, is so precious. School and work aside, there is a considerable chunk of time taken doing seemingly small chores and activities that can take time away from your family. Cleaning, meal prep, personal admin, these can all take time away without you thinking twice. There are some simple ways to regain those marvelous minutes.
Cook and freeze meals on the weekend to be eaten together during the week, or you can order meals from Harvest.ph. Use ride-sharing services like Uber so that you can answer emails on the way home. Hire a cleaning service like Happy Helpers to come in once per week.
You know what works in my family? Everyone chips in. My husband does chores. No such thing as "domestic duties are for women" BS in our home! All the children have a task to do—packing away, making beds, setting the table, cleaning the car, sorting the laundry, cooking. Don't think you can do it all yourself. You can have it all but only if you don't do it all. You can quote me, mamas.
4. Make time for you.
When you are tired, both physically and mentally, you will be less inclined to sit and enjoy family moments. This is why I know I need household help, mamas! I'm always so cranky and mean when I'm tired. Guess what? I'm always tired! But this year, with the youngest boy finally weaned and my two older boys in school, I now have a little time for myself and my mood has improved a little.
Taking care of yourself can be as simple as eating. Yes, mamas. Don't forget to eat! Something as simple as a yogurt or banana is excellent if you're too busy to eat anything else. This year, I am so grateful because I can now take baths again. I don't have to rush through my showers anymore because the baby is crying, and that is a big deal! I also get a mani and pedi once a month or a massage as I wait for my kids to be let out from school. I have also gotten more sleep since my youngest stopped breastfeeding. I'm so happy! From 4 hours of sleep since 2010, I now sleep 6-8 hours! This is monumental for me! This 2018, I've started doing 10 minutes of exercise every day, and I'm hoping I won't just become a stronger and healthier mother but that those endorphins will also make me a more cheerful one.
5. Never stop learning.
Sometimes, you really just have to accept you can't have a normal job and have a fantastic family life at the same time. Many moms I know had to quit their jobs and started a career from their home. They became real estate agents, insurance agents, freelance writers, graphic designers, artists, makeup artists, and bloggers. Sometimes, it's the other way around. You haven't been employed because you devoted 5-10 years to your kids and now they're all in school and you want to go back to work. What to do???
Whether you're going back to work, quitting your job, want to start a business, or planning to work from home, you can still be a mega working mama by learning a new skill that can help you become better at your job or propel you to a new career. The best part is technology makes it possible for you to do this from home or on your spare time! You can sign up for the Master Class courses (the ones taught by celebrities!), attend workshops (like the Boss Bellas ones I do with Manila Workshops), or enroll in online MBA AACSB accredited courses.
At a photo shoot with two kids in tow. Possible but not easy! Still, I'm grateful for my life!
When you're a working mama, you'll likely feel tired and overwhelmed. Your family won't always be as supportive as you need them to be as they struggle to adjust to your new job or the ever-changing demands on a working mother. But your work is not just for putting food on the table, it's also for your personal happiness, so don't ever think you're not being a good mother just because you have a career and are overwhelmed. You can do this, mamas!
It's 2018! Happy New Year! As with everyone alive on the planet, I decided I was going to be healthier in 2018. Again heehee. But this time I mean it. So I started the year doing cardio and push-ups and crunches and hip thrusts and squats. I did well, too, doing four reps of ten for each exercise. I felt so strong! So proud so proud.
But then I wake up and my whole body is freaking out, right? My whole body literally can't move. I think I injured myself. I crawled out of bed. My eldest boy was worried enough to say he can borrow the trolley from our condo so he can push me around. Heehee so cute! Anyway, after stretching my limbs gingerly, I felt well enough to hobble about.
So here's the thing. As part of my new healthy lifestyle, I'm now drinking 8 glasses of water. I'm so proud of myself, guys. But you know what that means—more trips to the bathroom. So imagine me hobbling to the toilet and when I get there, I CAN'T SIT DOWN. Frikkin' thighs and ass are SCREAMING. I'm gasping the F-word every single time I sit down!
I just want to pee standing up. I wish I had a penis after every leg exercise day so I won't have to sit and die every time I pee.
It's January 3 and I already want to give up. But I won't. I'm going to do this! Last year, my goal was to have pimple-free skin and eat healthier. I did that. Yes!!! This year, I'm going to get fit and strong. So even though my body is hating me at this point, I'm going to keep tough loving it.
Don't worry. I'm not going to turn into a fitness blogger (unless may sponsor hahahahaha #keepingitreal). But if you can give me tips on how to pull off getting fit when my working mama life is already so full (especially since I have no kasambahay to watch over the kids while I hie off to the gym), that would be a huge help!
Hi, everyone! I'm Frances. I'm the author of Not Invisible. I'm also a lifestyle and parenting writer, a book editor, the co-founder of Lean In Manila, and I have a day job in corporate communications. When I find time away from my busy life as all mentioned and as a wife and mom, I blog here.
Welcome to my blog! It's a 16-year-old honest and safe space for working moms, mothers of boys, and feminists (I just described all of myself). Thanks for dropping by!
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