Showing posts with label Mommy Issues. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Mommy Issues. Show all posts

Saturday, August 09, 2025

What I’m Doing Now—and What I Still Dream Of

Some of you have asked what I’m up to lately (or maybe you haven’t, but I’m telling you anyway), so here’s a little work update! With photos of me at the office, too.


I’m currently with Personal Collection, a proudly Pinoy direct selling company with a mission to help Filipino families live a #LifeMadeGreat by having their own business. What do I do there? A bit of everything I'm really good at—social media posts, scripts for events and videos, blog posts, posters, brochures, magalogues, flyers, posters. I also manage our ambassador program. It’s easy work. Just LOTS of it. But it's fun! And I get tons of free products every month, too! (I'll do a giveaway soon of our lipsticks!)

Everyone introduces me as "the writer". Officially, I'm the communications manager. It's a broad enough title that if I were to resign, they'll have to hire a copywriter, SEO writer, social media manager, influencer program manager, dealer storytelling strategist, dealer comms and program coordinator, and creative project manager to replace me! 

What makes my job meaningful is that the target market of all the comms we make is our own dealers. So we're not your regular in-house ad agency broadcasting to the end-consumer; we're communicating with our dealers, showing them how to sell their products, and manage and grow their business. Every weekday, I think of how to make our dealers feel proud of what they do. And because I’m all about women empowerment, I find it incredibly fulfilling to see the transformed lives of our million-strong dealers, many of whom are mothers like me. So there is a purpose in what I do.

But... life can't be perfect. 

Many of my dear Loyal Readers (the WAHMs and the housewives) have asked me how going back to work feels like, and for so long I couldn't answer. But I think I'm ready now. 

So here comes the real talk! I spend 10 hours a day at the office. I really try not to go beyond that because I promised my kids I won't, so overtime feels like me betraying my promise. I'm glad to report that OT rarely happens because I really finish my tasks within those 10 hours. 

Ten hours at work plus 1.5 hours commute is a huge shift for someone who was with her husband and sons 24/7 for an entire decade. These days, I barely see them, and that’s hard on the heart. It really, really is. I spent my first 9 months at work crying, grieving my time away from my family, worried sick about them, and finally feeling that working-mom guilt I never felt when I was a mommy blogger and freelance writer and editor. 

I keep reminding myself that I’m paid well enough, the work has purpose, and my kids are thriving in school and with friends. But, wow, I can't stop missing my family. I'm almost 3 years in the corporate world and I’m still not used to being away from Vince and the boys. 

Let's not forget that I also have a writing and editing business, a business that I've only slowly resurrected this year with a few blogging and writing projects. So I'm happy about that! 

I'm also still dreaming of more books to write. The utter joy I got from my Not Invisible book was so addictive, I want to feel that again and again. These dreams of new books are in the process of becoming real because I’ve got half a dozen book manuscripts just waiting to be finished, but no time (yet!) to work on them. Still, I managed to write a couple of children’s books recently so... hooray! I hope to publish them one day, with my devotionals and novels, too. 

One day, one day.

Honestly, mamas, if you're thinking of going back to work after the incredible privilege of being with your babies, well... It's not easy. I don't want to discourage you because there's so much satisfaction in doing what you're good at and earning recognition and money for it. 

But it's hard to juggle that with wanting to relish any little time we can find with our family. Work can always be done and money can always be made, but time with our children? The time is so very short. Terrifyingly short. Sooner than I know, they're off to college, off to new adventures, off to a life without their Mama.

Can you believe it? Didn't I just give birth to them yesterday? 

I feel like I'm running out of time.

It's so strange how both grief and joy, and longing and contentment can hold space inside me all in the same breath. Yes, I’m doing well. I’m grateful for this job and would like to keep it. I thank God every day that I get to enjoy this amazing blessing. But I ask Him just as often if this is what He wants for me because I miss my boys so much. 

Do I want to earn a regular income? Yes.

Do I want to spend more time with my teens and tween? Yes.

Do I wish I had more time to write my books? Yes. 

Do I enjoy making content to help our dealers become more successful women? Yes.

Do I look at my messy house and think, "This home needs a mother's loving touch again"? Yes.

Do I try not to think about how we haven't had any activities for Lean In Manila this year? Er, yes.

Do I also recognize how good I’ve got it right now? Absolutely.

Oh, it's complex, this tug of war in my heart. I know life can’t be perfect... but mine is pretty close. So I'll remain grateful. 

And open. 

And waiting.


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Monday, August 04, 2025

5 Lessons from Meghan Sussex on Navigating Life with Grace and Purpose


I'm so inspired by Meghan, Duchess of Sussex. 

I'm absolutely sure I have none of her resilience and grace, the strength that not only makes her survive the constant hate but even thrive despite it. When she started 2025 with a carefree run on the beach, we didn't realize that she meant to go full blast this year... but not full blast retaliation on all the horrible creatures who hate her, but a full blast on creativity. The world wanted to destroy her, so she responded with creation. 

And, whether we appreciate it or not, we're getting Meghan's projects one after the other. Just for the first half of this year, we have a TV show, a lifestyle brand, a podcast, and a shopping site! The Duchess of Success!

But more than that, because it's her birthday, I want to talk about the life lessons I learned from Meghan. And she truly has been offering a masterclass in focus and authenticity. I like her approach to life because it's filled with powerful lessons we can all learn from.
  
1. Stay true to who you are.

Before becoming a royal wife, Meghan was busy not just with her work as an actress, but also with helping charities and empowering women, while also building a lifestyle blog. She chose to marry a man whose goal was to help people, too. When she was a working royal, she immediately got busy with the same, marrying her love for fashion, cooking, and women, with the charities she worked with. 

Now, her circumstances have changed, but she's still the same! Everything she's doing now still reflects her personal values of authenticity, intentional living, and service. Whether it’s through mindful products or purposeful storytelling, Meghan showed me that we should align our work with our values. That's how we don't get lost when life's storms and temptations come crashing your way. 

Stay true to what matters to you, whether you have an audience or not. Stay true to yourself. Don't be shaped by what the world says you should be.

When nothing seems to be going right, focus on the things that do! Family, friends, food, fun!

2. Focus on the work.

I think everyone has experienced being mocked, insulted, and discouraged. Maybe not on a global scale, sure, but I can relate somewhat - just a tiny, tiny bit - to Meghan. I didn't get support growing up because people dismissed my dreams a lot. When you're raised in a fundamentalist Christian environment and a traditional Filipino household, you're taught that women aren't supposed to have dreams, unless it's a dream of wife and mom. Which is great! I'm a wife and mom. And more! Like Meghan, I refused to be discouraged and got busy building. 

That said, I did start this blog almost 20 years ago because I wanted to be understood. I don't regret it because my life changed exponentially because of this blog. Watching Meghan, however, makes me think I wish I had had her grace. She refuses to engage in the hateful conversations. She doesn't waste time defending herself or making herself understood. Instead, she pours her energy into meaningful projects. She proves that healing comes from creating, not from explaining yourself even through constant criticism (even of her pasta!). 

Here's my version of her Single Skillet Pasta. Instead of lemon, I used calamansi to add brightness and freshness to what would've been a plain dish.

 3. Take your time.

Yes, she focused on work, but it took her 5 years to stage her comeback. She took her time. People find this hard to believe. They always accuse her of doing interviews regularly, but before this year, she only did a few, like Oprah, Ellen, and The New York Times. She had a few projects (her children's book, a documentary, a podcast), but mostly, she stayed hidden away at home, making and raising babies. Making friends with her neighbors. Investing in women-owned businesses. And apparently, she was also quietly preparing for her comeback.

This is a powerful lesson in protecting your peace—less reacting, more building. A lesson also on moving quietly with people you trust. A lesson on patience and waiting for the right time to launch. She wasn't worried about staying relevant. She just trusted herself and her timing. 

In my case, I'll always be grateful my husband and I had the immense privilege of working from home the first 10 years we were parents. People were worried about us quitting employment. But Vince was writing his novel while I was blogging. Unconventional, maybe, but true to who we are (writers)... and who we've become (parents!). We didn't feel like life passed us by at all. We were living it and oh so thoroughly!

Your life, your pace.  

4. Pursue joy!

I really liked her Netflix series, With Love, Meghan. As you can see, I've shared a few photos of stuff I learned from her show. I love how she shares how she makes ordinary things special. Some, I admit I won't ever do. I can't ever be persuaded to make my own candles when I can buy from my friend who does make such wonderful ones (buy from Meadow!). But I agree that life is bad and boring enough already. Let's add some joy! Why wallow in the bland, the ugly, and the miserable, right? 

So I bought flowers. I took out my jewelry. I'm intentional with my self-care. I'm seeing family and friends. I'm eating more fruits and veggies (okay, I'm still learning to find joy in this). I want to live in beauty and glow with joy! I mean, just look at Meghan - moisturized, fit, fab.

If you want edible flower sprinkles, you can get from Landers.

5. Turn pain into a paycheck.

As Alessia Cara sang in her song, "Okay Okay," we have the option to turn pain into a paycheck. Meghan may have gone through horrific treatment for almost a decade (and she's still getting bullied by the most evil old and ugly people in the world), but she keeps creating. Whether it's a family and a home or business deals, she’s proof that forward momentum is the best response to negativity. I especially like how she now has a shopping site. Not only do we now know exactly what she uses, she also took away from those evil tabloids their income from affiliate links. If there's anyone who should earn from her lifestyle choices, it should be her. 
 

Meghan Sussex shows us that success doesn’t have to be loud and quick. It doesn't have to be constant visibility. You can be at home, picking berries and making crudites (my literal word of the year haha), and still dream and make money. Just stick to who you are and what you love, and you'll be more than okay. Okay?

Happy birthday, Meghan!

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Sunday, May 18, 2025

What my weekends look like

All the illustrations in this post are by Sarenur Türk Koçak. I need to tell you about her! Sare is an architect based in Turkiye. She also makes puzzles! Follow her Instagram @sayu.go. 

Anyway, I feel like rambling today. Would you mind so very much if I go stream of consciousness today? Well, the great thing about blogs (and every kind of content) is you can just stop reading. But stick around if you want to get to know me more today.


So the title of this blog post should really be "What my weekends should look like all the time." The "all the time" part is important because my weekends do kinda look like this. It's not just the single and child-free women who enjoy this kind of soft life.

(Gosh, I am so ready for my soft life era.) 

When I was a teen, this had been the plan. And Sare's illustrations made me remember that. Work all week, then spend weekends cuddled up with a book in bed or sprawled on the sofa listening to music. Notice there is no man or children in my teen fantasies. My reality, meanwhile, has a man and 3 sons in it! 

What happened? Well, I fell in love. And he was able to convince me that my precious solitude and peace were worth giving up for his company and the chaos of our children. So far, so good. 

I won't lie: There are many, many times I feel wistful for my solitude. Marriage and motherhood can be overwhelming for any woman but especially to someone who likes to be alone. But I love my family very much, though they bewilder me at times. Why do they (husband included) have so many needs? Why do they need me so much? Why do they like talking to me? Why do I have to eat with them (I think one of life's greatest pleasures is eating alone)? Why must I give up reading my book for them (another great life pleasure)? 

The answer to that is because they love me. And so, it's okay. I love them, too.


I don't have many friends. My friends are my friends because we can go for long stretches of time not talking or seeing each other. That is what I prefer. The ones who needed nurturing fell away. I don't understand the constancy of friendship. If we really are friends, then there is no need to keep assuring ourselves of this friendship. Clinginess is a sign of insecurity. 

And then I went ahead and got married and had babies! Babies are so clingy! 

My husband isn't clingy, though. Thank the heavens. Whenever I see couples who are constantly together, I feel suffocated. I saw a celebrity couple before where he was in her space all the time. People swooned, "How romantic!" I just thought, "How invasive."

(Break na sila. Guy cheated and treated her badly. I am not surprised.) 

I guess that's one good reason our marriage works. I don't think I could stand to be with a man who desperately needed me. I respect a man who is whole on his own, who can be happy with his own company. A man who needs someone else to complete him is a dangerous man. They are fearful, insecure, jealous. They are not real men.

I cannot stand and will not suffer a person like that. As Astrid told her husband in Crazy Rich Asians, "It is not my job to make you feel like a man. I can't make you into something you're not." Literally the only good line in that movie. 

Ladies, when a man gets jealous or insecure, run. 


So what are my weekends like? I still wake up early. At 6, 6:30, 7, thereabouts. But I don't get up till 9. Or until my bladder tells me so. I don't prepare breakfast because I do that 5 days a week. The kids, who wake up late, rummage around the kitchen. Most Sundays, my husband and kids make pancakes. I'm the first one up, so I make myself a cup of coffee and then do the laundry. I handwash the kids' uniforms and our underwear. The rest of our clothes, sheets, and towels, I send off to the laundromat.

I clean a little. I ought to clean more, but I'm tired. I cook. And then after lunch is when I do everything illustrated by Sare here. I read Wattpad or a paperback. I make the rounds on Facebook, Twitter, Threads, and Instagram. Then I nap. If I have time, I do self-care. I spend an hour in the bathroom, washing and conditioning my hair, scrubbing my body raw, applying oil, lotion, and all my preservatives, like face masks, hair masks, acids, deep hydration stuff, foot scrub, buffing my nails or putting on polish, etc, etc. If all my weekends were like this, I think I'd be drop-dead gorgeous. As it is, I'm usually doing chores and then sleeping away the afternoons. Self-maintenance can wait.  

My favorite weekends are when I laze around like the women in these pictures and do absolutely nothing. Those soft-life weekends are rare.

During the school year, weekends are tough. The laundering of the uniforms. Buying stuff they need for school. Helping with homework. Managing all the clutter and chaos of schoolboys. During long breaks (Holy Week, sem break, Christmas break, and summer), everything slows down, and I'm happy.

That's why I miss quarantine. I don't miss COVID. But I sure miss when we were all just home. Life was perfect for me those years.     


My weekends are never quiet. With a full house, it's very noisy. There's always someone playing the guitar or the piano. There's always someone singing (that would be me and my middle boy). There's always music. And video games. And movies. It's a very noisy home, but I can nap through all that racket. I'm that tired.

My husband complains a lot when he's cleaning up. It stresses out the kids. It doesn't bother me so I assure the kids not to mind their father when he's cleaning. I think it's just his way of cleaning. My mother and father were the same. I think it helps them clean. I'm the same way, except I sing when I clean and cook. My Lola Auring told me not to do that because she said it attracts bad luck into the home. Or that I'd end up marrying an old man, and she gave herself as proof. My lolo was 14 years older than her. Well, I married a man just 3 years older, and since I sing really badly, I guess that's the bad luck there. 

My husband says he likes my playlists. I sing stream-of-consciousness, too, so if I started with an '80s song, then it's going to be an hour of me singing '80s songs! My kids must've gotten used to my singing because today I sang "American Pie" and they sang along. They already know the old songs I sing because that's how often I sing. Badly, yes, but I seem to still make them love music!
 

So anyway. It's Sunday night. I'm finally alone. I'm blogging. The clothes are drying. The husband and kids are quiet, either reading or sleeping. It's the last week of school tomorrow, so I'm looking forward to their summer break. I can finally enjoy the soft life drawn here. I can't wait!
 


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Sunday, May 11, 2025

Soak it all in


They're all big boys now. These love piles can never happen again (I would be suffocated!). 


So I sometimes wish at night that when I fall asleep, I would be whisked off to the days when they were small. And I get to experience it all again. 


But this second time, I'd not be so overwhelmed and exhausted, and finding my way. 


In my dreams, I'd be just simply happy. 
In my dreams, the mama me would know everything would turn out right. 


Everything would be perfect actually so there would be no need for my anxiety and fear. 


I had been amazing all along. 


I had been so amazing all along. 


And I would just relax and soak it all in. 


I would just soak it all in.



Happy Mother's Day, mamas. You're doing a great job! Let's pause and breathe sometimes, okay? It goes by so very fast. So very fast. Let's just soak it in.

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Sunday, April 20, 2025

Our After-School Game Plan

In our family, we do presentations. For example, our sons presented their report cards, how they got their grades, their goals for the last quarter of the school year, and their proposal on how we (parents, brothers) can help them reach their goals. 

Here's another one, which I'm sharing with my mommy readers! This is my presentation - an after-school game plan. The boys are aware of this, but since we've never talked about it (just me and their father nagging them forever), the boys don't really follow. So we all gathered round for a quick pow-wow, I made my presentation, and got everyone to agree with me!

Let's go over it: 




My sons always forget to unpack! This really upset me because we forget to wash their lunchboxes and water bottles, we trip over their shoes, and their uniforms and socks are strewn all over their bedroom! I swear they were better at unpacking when they were preschoolers (yes, I'm grumbling).


My sons know how to cook so they can really take over dinner prep. I get home at around 6:50 to 7:15 so I'm usually too tired to cook. My husband usually cooks, but sometimes he has work meetings that go on till 7 so the boys must take over this task. 



My sons bring their gadgets to the bathroom to sing. They love to sing musicals in the shower! They protested this slide haha so I said they need to find a compromise. Their Papa suggested Bluetooth speakers. I really don't like it when they have gadgets in the bathroom. Aside from accidentally getting their gadgets wet, I'm also paranoid about people hacking their cameras, and one of my singing sons will be in the shower and... I shudder to think about it. 




For this part, we discussed (1st quote) how these tasks don't actually take a lot of time. Just minutes every day saves us time and resentment. And to avoid feeling resentful, (2nd quote) we just need to focus on ourselves and our tasks. We shouldn't look at what the others are not doing, or we shouldn't think, "Hey, I'm washing more dishes than him," and neither should we assume that someone is intentionally not doing their chores. We can only control our actions, our thoughts, and our feelings. And that's what matters (3rd quote) - self-discipline! Doing our individual parts helps the whole!  

That's it! Just a 5-minute presentation and a little discussion, and we were all in agreement. No nagging, no arguing. Just a peaceful way to remind my sons of their duties, and a way for me and their Papa to let them know that we have goals, too, and we need their help because if all our time is spent on cooking and cleaning, then we won't have time and energy to make our dreams come true! When they realized we needed their help, they were willing to do their part. So hooray!

I hope this helps you, mamas! 

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Monday, March 24, 2025

Proper Diapering: 7 Things Moms and Dads Should Always Remember

Hi, everyone! Let's talk about...  proper diapering!

Ask any parent, and they’ll most likely tell you how caring for a baby is a full-time job that requires patience and a lot of learning along the way. One of their many responsibilities—and one of the most frequent tasks—is changing diapers. While diapering may seem like a simple routine, doing it properly can make a huge difference in your baby’s comfort, hygiene, and overall health.


A clean, properly fitted diaper helps prevent discomfort, leaks, and skin irritation. Good diapering practices also reduce the risk of diaper rash and infections, ensuring your baby stays fresh and happy throughout the day. For new moms and dads, diapering can come with challenges. However, with the right techniques and knowledge, diaper changes can be smooth, efficient, and hassle-free.

From choosing the right diaper to handling your baby safely, we’ll walk you through essential diapering tips.

1. Choose the Right Diaper Size for Your Baby

One of the first things you need to take note of when diapering is picking the right diaper size. A diaper that is too small may cause red marks and leave your baby feeling uncomfortable; it can also lead to leaks. On the other hand, a diaper that is too loose may not provide enough protection.

So, when you shop for your baby’s diapers, make sure they fit your child perfectly. If you have an infant, make sure to get something marked “diaper for baby” and check the weight range of the diaper size. It’s also a good idea to check if you can fit two fingers under the waistband. This indicates that the diaper is secure but not too tight. If you notice frequent leaks, red marks on your baby’s skin, or difficulty securing the diaper properly, it might be time to move to the next size. Since babies grow quickly, be prepared to adjust diaper sizes as your child gains weight.

2. Be Aware of How Often You Should Change a Newborn’s Diaper

Newborns need frequent diaper changes since they urinate often and have multiple bowel movements each day. As a recommendation, change a newborn’s diaper every two to three hours or immediately after they have soiled it. If you leave a wet or soiled diaper on for too long, it can cause skin irritation and lead to painful diaper rashes or even potential infections.

For older babies, the frequency of diaper changes may decrease as their bladders develop and start to urinate less frequently. However, it’s still important to keep an eye on your baby’s diaper throughout the day to ensure they stay dry and comfortable.

3. Always Wash Your Hands Before and After Diapering

Diaper changes expose both parents and babies to bacteria, making proper hand hygiene essential. Before touching your baby, wash your hands with soap and water to prevent the spread of germs. After changing the diaper, wash your hands again.

If soap and water aren’t available, alcohol-free baby wipes or a gentle alcohol-based hand sanitizer are a good alternative. Keeping a small bottle of sanitizer near the diapering area ensures that you always have a quick way to clean your hands after a change.

4. Properly Wipe and Clean Your Baby

After diaper changes, proper cleaning helps prevent infections and keeps your baby comfortable. For baby girls, always wipe from front to back to prevent bacteria from spreading to the genital area, which can lead to urinary tract infections. For baby boys, make sure to gently clean the genital area, paying attention to folds of skin where dirt may accumulate.

Some parents prefer using fragrance-free baby wipes, but warm water and soft cotton are a gentler option, especially for newborns. If your baby has sensitive skin or is prone to rashes, using just water can help prevent irritation. After wiping, make sure the area is completely dry before putting on a new diaper to reduce the risk of diaper rash.

5. Handle Your Baby Safely During Diaper Changes

Most newborns and young babies can move unpredictably, which is why you need to handle them carefully yet securely during diaper changes. Always support your baby’s legs by gently lifting their ankles rather than pulling on their feet. Avoid lifting their legs too high, as this can put unnecessary pressure on their lower back.

Additionally, ensure that you’re changing your baby on a stable, flat surface and never leave them unattended, even for a second, to minimize the risk of falls.

6. Apply the Diaper Correctly

A properly fitted diaper helps prevent leaks and keeps your baby comfortable. When putting on a diaper, make sure the waistband is snug (not tight) and sits just below the belly button; for newborns, you can fold the diaper down in the front to avoid covering the umbilical stump. You should also adjust the leg openings to ensure they fit well. There should be no gaps to prevent any leaks, but still loose enough so that there’s some space between the diaper and your baby’s bum.

7. Prevent and Treat Diaper Rash

Diaper rash is a common issue among babies, but it can be prevented with proper care. To reduce the chances of diaper rash, change diapers frequently to prevent prolonged contact with moisture. Also, apply a thin layer of diaper rash cream or petroleum jelly to create a protective barrier. Additionally, give your baby some diaper-free time to allow their skin to breathe.

If your baby develops a persistent or severe rash, consult a pediatrician to determine if medical treatment is needed.


Diapering is a daily routine that you’ll quickly become familiar with as parents. However, you need to watch out for small mistakes. Otherwise, they can lead to discomfort for your baby. With this in mind, consider following these diapering tips to help keep your little one happy, dry, and protected.


*baby photo by Ignacio Campo on Unsplash, products photo by Sincerely Media on Unsplash
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Saturday, January 18, 2025

My 2025 Vision Board

Happy New Year to all my dear Loyal Readers! How's 2025 treating you so far? Me, well, all the songs playing in my head have these lyrics: "Such a feelin's gotten over me. There is wonder in most everything I see...", "It's gonna be a bright bright sunshiny day," and "I had a dream so big and loud I jumped so high, I touched the clouds, all the possibilities, no limits, just epiphanies!" 

I guess you can tell I like the vibe of 2025! 

I have lots and lots of plans. All involve words! A devotional. A workbook. A romance trilogy (yep, that werewolf romance novel I started in 2022 nag-multiply!). A children's book. Maybe even a literary website. Am I launching them all this year? I don't know! The plan is just to finish them and then we'll see! Hope you support me as always!


Speaking of plans, one of the best things I did recently was attend a workshop by Belle de Jour Power Planners. The formal name is Life & Business Vision Integration Workshop. Sounds so serious so I just call it the BDJ Goals Workshop. I attended the one last December at Coffee Bean & Tea Leaf at BGC and I believe that event propelled me to my happy, hopeful vibe. 

Madaling mangarap, mahirap tuparin ang mga ito. But because of the goals- and intention-setting sessions we did (na may kasamang personal sharing at iyakan pa!), parang lahat kaya kong abutin - kahit na yung ambisyosa kong goal na mag-publish ng 6 books this 2025! Ngayon pa lang alam ko it's a giant task but because we were taught to set goals in bite-sized pieces and to make them all short-term, napaniwala ako ni Darlyn Sandra Ty-Nilo na kaya kong gawin ito. 


Here's Dar, soft-spoken and a truly inspirational speaker. I've known her since my editor days (so that's almost 2 decades) and she's achieved so much. Not only did she launch a successful planner business, she's also become a motivational coach, connecting women and empowering them to start making their dreams come true through concrete steps (that's tied up neatly with her planner biz, diba?). Despite knowing her all this time and having worked with BDJ briefly, it was only at this Goals Workshop that I got to know her as a woman driven to make other women succeed. It was a revelation! I encourage you all to sign up for this workshop kasi it's like the heavens open up for you and talaga namang parang lahat kaya mong gawin!

Here's a peek at what happened at our workshop. We had delicious food served while we learned and shared and made our vision boards. We got a BDJ planner, a lovely journal, art materials for our vision board, and of course vital lessons on setting goals. 

I hope this is still a safe space to share with you my dreams. I always have done that with you since I started this blog in 2006. And I may have disappeared for a while (the last 2 years were very interesting) but I'm dreaming and planning and hoping again! And maybe I can share some of those hopes and dreams with you like I used to, if that's okay?

So here's my vision board!  


At the top is me writing books and blogs. That's all I really want to do - make a living on words alone! Everyone told me that was a dumb dream but my husband and I are making it happen! Next is me speaking to a group of women. I used to do this - hold workshops, be a guest speaker. I want to do that again. I'm thinking I'd do a speaking event when I launch my books! Will you be there? I'm so deathly afraid that no one will show up for me but then you ladies always have. Thank you from the bottom of my heart. (Now, I don't know if you're still around given that I've been silent for a while but if you're still here, it means a lot.) Last pic is a crazy idea - do a podcast. It's crazy because I have the worst voice ever. It's squeaky, not for broadcasting at all. But hey, I think I have some important things to say and a podcast may be in my future (I really don't think so, though haha but like I said this goals workshop makes you believe in the crazy!).

The left part is personal goals. I want to spend more time with my family and friends, enjoying life. Then, because I'm going through a transition that is traumatic to the body (a.k.a. perimenopause), I want to care for myself with proper nutrition, enough sleep, regular exercise, and also indulge now and then in a massage because my body has served me so well in the last 48 years. I should serve it now.

The right part is all money! My husband and I have insurance policies and mutual funds to help us with our retirement years (10-12 years na lang grabe!!!) so kami ni Vince, we're ready. But I want to save up anyway for the kids. I want to give them the world but writing - surprise surprise haha - doesn't really make a lot of money unless Vince and I become bestselling authors (like millions of copies sold!). It's not impossible but, boy, I hope it happens sooner than later because my boys are growing up so fast and I want to give them music lessons and art classes and sports and take them all over the world... 

I am running out of time. I am running out of time.

But I am not unhappy. Believe me when I say I am overflowing with joy. Despite the perimenopause hell, the long hours at the office, the having just-enough money, the unfinished books, the never having enough time... I am still so happy. My husband and I are still in love, we and the kids are healthy, we are safe, the kids are growing up so fast and they're all so handsome and smart and talented, we all get along fine, we're okay! We're more than okay. We're happy.

That said, I still need to dream bigger! I am so blessed that for a time I stopped myself from dreaming of more because it just felt so greedy, you know? I have so much! Maybe not money and time haha but everything else? Siksik, liglig at umaapaw! So I had been telling Jesus, "Okay na po ito. Tama na. Masaya na ako. Just help me be a good wife and mother and take care of the precious people you gave me." 

But somewhere along the way I just felt that God didn't give me all these stories and experiences and writing talent to just be quiet! Jesus promised me an abundant life, a life that should be all used up so that he can keep on pouring into my cup! In John 10:10, Jesus said, "The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I came so that they would have life, and have it abundantly."

I have allowed the devil to steal my purpose. I am a writer. Before I was a wife and mother and till the day I die, I hope I will still be writing. So that's what I'll do. Write! Will it make me money? I hope so! But that's just a benefit. I want to write because I want to tell stories that inspire women and I want to change lives again, the way my blogs used to when I used to blog a storm the last 18 years. Woah! Yep. Let's add more years to that, shall we? Yes! Thank you for reading all these years!

So anyway! That's my vision board. Please help me make those visions real. As in yung mahahawakan, matitikman, at mararanasan ko at ng pamilya ko. Stick around for updates!


And if you're interested in a little life-changing day, sign up for the Life & Business Vision Integration Workshop a.k.a. the BDJ Goal Setting Workshop! Register now for just P3,999! You won't regret it! 
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