Uncle Buck's family responds

Actually, that should be Tito Bak. I still don't know his real full name and where he lives but his daughter, Joan Irell Ayson Cabaguio, gave his contact info at the very end of her heartfelt letter and I guess we can ask him ourselves.

Anyway, so I wrote about how the bag business ended in such an ugly fashion two weeks ago. Today, Joan sent me a message defending her father. You should all read it:

Hi. This is Joan Irell Ayson-Cabaguio, the daughter of “Uncle Buck”. I will be answering some of your questions and confusions one by one about your satchel business. Please take some time to read what I have to say.
Let me quote some of the things you mentioned in your blog.
1. “Business Partner never told us where Uncle Buck lived but we figured we didn't need to know. I worked harder but I figured that since without Business Partner, there'd be no Uncle Buck, Business Partner and I should split the profits 50-50, even though capital was 100% me.”

Firstly, in a business like this, you should be familiar with your business partners and more importantly with your supplier because everything will be one sided if ever anything comes up like what just happened. And that’s why I am writing this, to clear everything up regarding my father whom you refer to as “Uncle Buck”, which is by the way spelled as “Bak”. One reason why you should get to know a person first before you can easily judge him by what other people say.
During the course of your business with my father, there were a lot of times when my father asked your Business Partner for you to come over his work place so that you can get to know him and as well as the business. And also, so that you can be oriented and be familiar with what handmade leather craft looks like when it is being done. In return, your Business Partner answered that if you were not busy with work, then you were out of the country. Despite this fact, my father still waited for the chance to meet or even talk to you either in person or through a call.

2. “Business Partner said Uncle Buck can deliver a batch in 4 weeks. Then the next batch became 6 weeks. Then it became whenever-the-bags-are-ready.”

As to this statement, it was very clear from the start (even before you ordered the first batch of bags) that my father told your Business Partner that the production of leather will be one of the problems because the production itself is inconsistent. This was due to the fact that the tanneries in Bulacan were not able to comply with the policies of the Department of Environment and Natural Resources (DENR) regarding the production of leather. As a result, these tanneries were ordered to be closed. Even though such fiasco happened, there were still a number of tanneries which managed to produce a minimal amount of leather. This left us purchasing a much higher cost of leather which came all the way from Cebu. My father did not charge you in that matter, instead he continued with the agreed amount of the bags.
3. “Anyway, since Uncle Buck said yes to the 100 bags, I deposited 80% of the cost of the order in Business Partner's account. It was a large amount of money. Deadline for delivery was Oct 15 (50 bags) and Nov 1 (the other 50 bags, which would be sold in the Global Pinoy bazaar scheduled on Nov 5-6). On the first week of October, Business Partner said he won't be able to deliver the bags because Uncle Buck wasn't able to make the bags because of Typhoon Pedring. Bulacan--where the leather was bought--was flooded. This was 10 days before delivery date. I had given the money weeks before Pedring ravaged Luzon. There had been plenty of time to buy leather before the floods. More important than "where are the bags?" is the question "where was the money?"”

Regarding with your deposit, my father only received 50% of the cost from your Business Partner, not 80% even though my father was asking for at least 70% of the cost so that he can buy more bulks of leather whenever there is a chance to do so. As I have mentioned earlier, the supply of leather is inconsistent and as the typhoon happened, it became harder for us to look for a bulk of leather. You were asking where the money was, my father does not know either. He will never have any interest with that small amount of money. He is not the type of person who will gamble his integrity and his business just for the sake of money. To tell you the truth, we do not earn, maybe, as much as you do when it comes to these satchels and doctor’s bags. As things happened and you cancelled the orders, there were 21 unassembled satchels together with the buckles, zippers, and magnetic snaps left, just in case you were wondering.

4. “ Business Partner said Uncle Buck was an alcoholic and worked slow, that he refused to hire/train more people to meet the demand. Then when I said we needed to order 100 bags plus around 20 doctor's bags for the Christmas bazaar season, Business Partner said Uncle Buck can do the 100 bags but that the craftsman refused to take on the doctor's bags. The way Business Partner described him, Uncle Buck seemed to be a major pain in the ass.”

In this business, my father is a really talented man and there are a lot of multinational companies in this industry that trust him with this kind of job. He has been in this business for 25 years now and there was never a complaint from any of those big companies and his usual customers. The reason why he never entertained the fact of getting more people to meet your demand is because the only things those people can do for him are the sewing and cutting because everything else is done by him. He is the one who will conceptualize and will think of strategies on how to make those bags with just enough leather and of course with a high quality. Having those people will only delay his work and they will just wait for him until he assembles the bags. Such things will just cost each one of you a lot of time since there will be a delay in the delivery of the bags, which neither of us like and a higher price because you have to pay for the extra hands. And one more thing, our products are purely handmade. There are no machines involved at all, even the way the bags are stitched that is why it takes a lot of time to do that compared to a machine made. And we assure you that it really is of high quality.

Don’t you think it is kind of unfair to judge someone whom you have never met and just heard stories about him? This also goes for everyone reading this. My father is a nice and quiet man and I cannot just sit back and watch you and your readers judge my father by what you just read or heard. This has been going for so long and we have been just ignoring such write-ups about my father. I admire you for you write so well regarding the business that some of our relatives from other countries get to see what you have to say about the products they have also purchased and used and it is just so sad that you have used your talent in writing such when everything turns out like this. We do not intend to offend anyone here and we just mean well for everyone and especially you and your baby.

As much as you care for your name and reputation, I also do care for my father’s name and reputation in this kind of business, which you boldly mentions his name for all these. My father does not even want me to do this because according to him it’s not worth it because he knows the truth, but this is my decision because I do not want to read hateful comments of your readers regarding the matter because they do not even know my father and what kind of person he really is. No one of us has the right to judge a person we do not really know especially if we have not met and have had the chance to talk with the person himself.

This goes especially to Ms. JEN LACEDA, you do not have the right to call as scammers because we are not. You do not know us especially my father and we don’t know you. SCAMMERS is such a strong word, so please think first before you use this word again. I’m sure you do not want your father to be called that way too.

And to you, Ms. Frances, we are not against you or your blogs about our business, I’m just answering your confusions about my father and our business. Still, we have high respect for you. Maybe, our business together is dead. We are also hoping that you may have a good business with your newly-found suppliers.

And to those who are still interested with my father’s craft, you can contact him directly to avoid misunderstandings. Send him a message at bakayson@gmail.com or at 09175292354/043 980 4478.
Thank you.

And this was my reply:

Thank you so much for this letter, Joan! All of my friends actually believe it wasn't Uncle Buck who is to blame because bakit daw sisirain niya ang source of income niya? I also believed that Uncle Buck is a good man--I think that someone who cares so much about his work and craftsmanship would have integrity. That's why I have been so confused when the business started going down. But I never was able to talk to him because I never knew where he lived and how to contact him. I just took the word of someone I should never have trusted.

As you already know, I never even knew the name of your father. So if you look at all my posts, his real name is NEVER mentioned. Also, I always wanted to go to Batangas and do a blog post on Uncle Buck, the workshop, how the bags are made but Business Partner said it wasn't necessary. And, no, we were never too busy with work! Again, I was too trusting and stupid.

As for charging additional, actually, Joan, we were charged additional. Nung umpisa Business Partner said ganitong amount. After a few weeks, I think dun sa third batch, sabi ni Business Partner, tinaasan na ni Uncle Buck yung presyo niya.

Thank you for clearing up everything. You are right--it's a huge misunderstanding caused by business naivete on my part and an unscrupulous person that I trusted too much. I apologize if this whole thing has hurt your family, the way it has hurt mine. But as you pointed out yourself, I never wrote Uncle Buck's real name--you can look through the entire blog and you will never find his real full name. And as I keep saying in my blog, it wasn't my personal judgement--I always stated that it was how the Business Partner described him.

I will publish this letter on my blog. There are a TON of people still interested in the bags and I'm just too tired, upset and sad about how it all went down. So I am sure they'll be very happy to contact your father directly.

Thank you, Joan. This really makes me so sad because it could've been so beautiful. Sayang talaga.

Sayang talaga. Nakakiyak actually. Gusto ko na naman magkulong sa kwarto at iyakan ito. I had such big dreams for this bag business! I was so in love with my satchels! I really thought they were better than all the bags out there. I had designs lined up, I had started talking to publications for promoting the bag biz. I was going to go big this 2012. Instead, all my dreams exploded in my face just like that because I was too stupid and trusting. Lessons have been learned, that's for sure.

Joan, salamat talaga sa sulat mo. On one hand, mas lalo lang ako nagalit sa sarili ko at kay Business Partner. On the other hand, mabuti na rin at nilinaw mo ang lahat. I have hoped to talk to your father myself, hoping to get my bags myself, but I just never knew how to contact him. So it ended so badly.

This blog post is my apology. You have been hurt. I have been hurt. This is just so ugly! Please don't be angry with my readers. If you read their comments again, wala naman talaga silang masaman sinabi. Sabi nga nila sayang daw at ang gaganda ng bags. Sabi pa nga ni Tito William, "I think the maker of the bag, like his product, has integrity." I know you're upset but I can assure you that my readers have high respect for your father and his craft.

And yet, even as you defend your father, you are still kind and polite to me. I felt your anger but I also felt your good heart. Thank you. I hope our business ventures, relationships and friendships this new year will be much better. I am sure you will have more customers. Meanwhile, I will take care of myself and my family first before doing this again. I hope we can be friends one day. I know, from your letter and from the way you described your father, that you are someone I can trust. May there be more people like you!

On love, hope and faith (plus lots of famous quotes!)

Last week, I got an email from a reader asking me for advice. Now I said I don't like giving advice but she was sincere and sad and desperate so I believe I had to say something. Here's what she asked (I edited it a bit):

Dear Ms. Frances,
My boyfriend and I have been together for five happy years. He said his New Year's resolution is to marry me. I'm very afraid of marriage because my father cheated on my mother constantly. How can I tell if my boyfriend, when he's my husband, won't cheat on me? You said you were also afraid of marriage but you never said why. How did you finally agree to marriage? How do you know Sir Vince will be faithful or that you yourself won't ever cheat on him?

Dear Fearful of the Unfaithful,

First of all, I think your guy is awfully cute. I've never heard of a New Year's resolution like that! The problem with his resolution, however, is it all depends on you and you happen to be resolute in remaining unmarried.

I think that it's unfair of you to keep him waiting, considering that you have, as you yourself described, five happy years as proof this guy loves you and you alone. But I am familiar with this fear of marriage so I won't condemn you.

The past is a powerful thing. So witnessing your father's infidelity and your mother's suffering can leave a horrible scar. Maybe it hasn't even healed. And now it's a wound that continues to hurt you... and your man. Look, your boyfriend is not your father and you are not your mother. Not all men are scumbags and not all women take shit. So don't let someone else's past affect your future!

I was afraid of marriage because, like you, I saw my mother suffer. My father never really took care of her--he didn't put that roof over her head, didn't provide for her and her children. But my mother never left him because she believed, as I do, that marriage is till death. Besides, he was the one man who made her laugh. However, she kept telling me, up to the last time we talked, that if she were to live her life all over again, she would never have gotten married. That's why I was deathly afraid of marriage. So you and I may have different reasons, but it led to the same results.

How did I finally agree to marry Vince? Well, I loved him. Still do. I believe I always will. Still, it seemed love wasn't enough of a reason to take that plunge. What made me finally marry him was my realization that life will never be perfect but, with Vince, it's going to be pretty darn close!

Still, it haunts us, my indecision. One time, I told Vince that that famous line from When Harry Met Sally made me cry: "When you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible." Vince replied, "Then why did you wait so long?"

That hit me in the gut. Why did I wait so long when I knew from the start he was The One? Because I was afraid, and fear, as a wise old Jedi once said, is the path to the dark side. Fear leads to anger, anger leads to hate, hate leads to suffering. And you, my dear sad frightened girl, are now suffering. You're afraid of the past. You're afraid of the future.

How can you tell a guy won't ever cheat on you? Well, you can't. It takes faith to marry. Faith, as the Bible says so eloquently, is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen (Hebrews 11:1). So in marriage, all you have going for you is hope--hope that he'll be true to you always, hope that you'll honor your vows, hope that your love will last forever. And hope, as Stephen King's Shawshank Redemption defines, is a good thing, maybe the best of things, and no good thing ever dies.

Aside from that wonderful word "happy," you didn't describe your relationship a lot but I think what you and your man have is a good thing. Don't let that good thing die. I think you know that, too. And I think you know exactly what to do.

The winner of the Face Shop GCs worth P3,000 is...

Chic & Sassy Mom!

I really read all the entries. I didn't do any randomizer, lottery or whatever method to pick a winner. I just chose the reader who I think would appreciate Face Shop products and a Kim Hyun Joong CD best. Yes, don't forget that there's a Kim Hyun Joong CD! I have no frakkin' idea who that guy is (even though I've seen him in the flesh) but I was made to realize that he is super duper famous. I wanted the winner to be someone who would shriek her head off when she found out she's going to win a Kim Hyun Joong CD, too, ya know? And since Chic & Sassy Mom is a huge fan of all things Korean, then she gets the prize!

Thanks for joining my contest, everybody! Try your luck again this week. I'm giving away prizes on Topaz Mommy and Beauty For A Living next! Personally, I think the prizes for those contests are even better. Watch for it!

* * * * * * *

JANUARY 25 UPDATE! By the way, since we're talking about Bench brands, might as well say that Bench is having another major sale TODAY!

Bench is 25 years old today and they're rewarding their loyal patrons with more discounts. If you have a Lifestyle Card, you get an additional 25% discount! But that extra price slash is only for TODAY!

I'm a Lifestyle Card owner (of course!). I collect sooo many points from shopping at Mothercare, Dimensione, Charles & Keith, PCX and Bench. And what do I do with the points? I use it for FREE haircuts for Vince and eyebrow threading for me at Bench Fix Robinsons Galleria!

What do you do with your Bench Lifestyle Card points?

Black is slimming. Stripes make you look fat.

So say the style rules. But pregnancy, in its usual exasperating way, changed the rules yet again.

I looked like a stuffed sausage in black...

Zara shirt, Gingersnaps leggings, Anthology flats,
Kate Spade bag, Vita Fede gold-studded leather bangle,
plastic earrings from tiangge

... but I looked really cute in stripes!

Zara tee, Gingersnaps shorts, Anthology tweed flats.
Longchamp clutch, Vita Fede gold-studded leather bangle,
pearl necklace

Weird.

Will post more pregnant pics soon!

Shop at Bench's Lifestyle Sale this long weekend. Plus, win 3K worth of GCs!

CONTEST IS CLOSED.

I mentioned here before that we shop a lot at Bench's brands. This weekend, I'm buying some drawers for my bathroom from Dimensione and a Moses basket from Mothercare (what's a Moses basket? Click here!).

And since we're in the area anyway, might as well check out the Great Lifestyle Sale and see if we can pick up more stuff. I do need sandals now (blame pregnant feet) and roomy tops (blame pregnant belly) and bigger undies (blame pregnant boobies and hips). Yes, pregnancy is an excuse to shop!

But you don't have to be pregnant to shop the Lifestyle Sale. So tell me: What would you like to buy? Which Bench brand do you love best? My favorite Bench brands are obviously Mothercare and Dimensione. How about you? Leave your answer in the comments below and I'll pick one lucky commenter who'll win P3,000 of GCs to The Face Shop and a Kim Hyun Joong CD!

I got them from a presscon last August when Face Shop image model Kim Hyun Joong visited Manila and I realized I'd rather give them away! My contest ends after the long weekend, yes, on Monday. Good luck!

Kung Hei Fat Choi! It's my year!

I was born in 1976, which makes me a Fire Dragon. I'm not Chinese but every time I tell a Chinese person that I'm a Fire Dragon, they get really impressed, and I haven't even told them all my other accomplishments yet! Seems to me that, to them, to be born a Dragon is a huge accomplishment in itself. Then when they find out that I'm giving birth in the year of the Water Dragon to a male child no less, my Chinese friends get all wild and happy and envious and full of wonder. They think I'm the luckiest woman alive!

Well, I don't believe in astrology but I won't say no to good fortune. And if a huge number of people think I'm incredibly lucky and powerful and blessed, then so be it! After all, my life does seem to be pretty fantastic. Whether or not that was destined, I am grateful.

Anyway, to usher in the year of the most powerful astrological sign, many companies have some awesome stuff lined up. They have deluged my inbox with press kits and, only because I'm a Dragon and 2012 is supposed to be my year, I'd like to share with you some of the more interesting stuff I got!

Party with Sun Life! 

The Dragon is believed to be the mightiest member of the Chinese astrology animal pack. The Dragon year is said to always be a lucky year because of the fierce energy it brings to everyone. Well, considering how terrible last year was (Japan earthquake and tsunami, political upheavals, Sendong), I say we need all the powerful and positive energy we can get this 2012!

Sun Life Financial (that's my family's insurance provider!) is celebrating the Dragon year with a truly terrific party! The morning of January 24 will witness a thousand-foot dragon dancing at the heart of the Chinese community in Binondo. It will parade through to Manila City Hall then Jones Bridge then end its dance spectacularly at Plaza Lorenzo. Why a dragon that's 1,000 feet long? Sun Life says it represents the "long and steady years that w ehave been of service to the Filipino and Chinese communities."

In the afternoon of the same day, the party continues in Bonifacio Global City. There will be performances by drumbeaters and zip and poi dancers. Plus, there will also be a special show called the "Fung Show," the highlight being a talk on improving your wealth, health and prosperity in the mighty year of the Dragon.

Bloggers who have those huge cameras (get an Olympus Pen, dammit! No, seriously, you don't need those mega-cameras in this day and age. Sa totoo lang talaga, hindi porke malaki camera mo, maganda na ang pictures mo) will definitely enjoy the chance to capture this colorful event. Families, too! Yes, everyone's invited! So if you're free on January 24, head on over to Binondo and BGC and enjoy the activities Sun Life lined up for you!

Welcome 2012 with Dunhill's Dragons!

I wrote that title myself since the press release had a rather prosaic one: "Chinese New Year 2012 - The Year of the Dragon." Parang mas masaya yung sa akin!

Anyway, Alfred Dunhill himself designed these lovely little pieces. Intricately carved in solid sterling and hand finished (and you know I'm a sucker for anything handmade), the collection consists of cuff links, key fobs and ties.

Exquisite key chain

Good luck charm for your phones

An incredible gift to your impeccably dressed man. Or for yourself,
if you like dressing up in crisp button-down shirts!

Press kit ends with "The Dragon sign is associated with bravery, honesty, pride and self-sufficiency. Dragons are irrepressible free spirits and enjoy grand gestures and ambitions." Sounds an awful lot like me! If you know a Dragon (ahem! ahem!), drop by Dunhill (Rustan's Makati, Newport Mall, Rustan's Tower) and get him/her a trinket.

I'd like the key chain please. Thanks!

Marks & Spencer celebrates the Chinese New Year 

with yummy treats!

There will be tons of celebrations next week and if anyone wants to invite me and my two Tigers (Vince and Vito were both born on Tiger years) to a party, drop me a comment below! I already know what gifts to bring the host and hostess and they'll be from Marks & Spencer.

I appreciate the very Britishness of Marks & Spencer so I think it's kinda cute that they prepared special treats (like gold coins, toffees and mints) for a Chinese holiday.

Hmm. Okay, so they're still nowhere near Chinese (not even close!) but, hey, who says no to sweet treats? Oh, you guys on a diet. Seriously, even on a happy holiday? Ditch the diet this long weekend! If you really can't, Marks & Spencer has some digestive biscuits. I actually like those a lot!

So there! Enjoy the long weekend with festivities, trinkets and treats! Happy New Year, everyone!

What happened to the satchel business

It died a horrible death on the first week of November 2011.

I guess you've already guessed that, being the smart people my readers are, but the Frances Sales satchel is still turning up on online searches for "best satchels" and "handmade leather bags." So until now, I'm still getting inquiries. I wasn't really aware of the inquiries since I stopped checking my Yahoo mail, the account I made especially for handling the bag business. But this weekend, Vince activated my new BlackBerry and all my email accounts showed up and, boy, there's a LOT of you still hankering for my satchel.

Well, my business is dead.

Or in a coma. I'm still on the lookout for a new supplier and I think I might've found one, but we've decided to wait till waaaay after baby Wiggle is born. Why? The baby is more important! If you only knew the stress and sorrow, the anger and humiliation I went through with the bag biz, you'd agree with me.

Here's what happened:

I started the satchel business in June and got an overwhelming response.

I had a business partner, who was the one who knew Uncle Buck, so he was assigned the production and delivery tasks while I handled customer service, marketing, transactions, and delivery. Business Partner never told us where Uncle Buck lived but we figured we didn't need to know. I worked harder but I figured that since without Business Partner, there'd be no Uncle Buck, Business Partner and I should split the profits 50-50, even though capital was 100% me.

Business Partner said Uncle Buck can deliver a batch in 4 weeks. Then the next batch became 6 weeks. Then it became whenever-the-bags-are-ready. Customers were complaining. Business Partner said Uncle Buck was an alcoholic and worked slow, that he refused to hire/train more people to meet the demand. Then when I said we needed to order 100 bags plus around 20 doctor's bags for the Christmas bazaar season, Business Partner said Uncle Buck can do the 100 bags but that the craftsman refused to take on the doctor's bags. The way Business Partner described him, Uncle Buck seemed to be a major pain in the ass.

Anyway, since Uncle Buck said yes to the 100 bags, I deposited 80% of the cost of the order in Business Partner's account. It was a large amount of money. Deadline for delivery was Oct 15 (50 bags) and Nov 1 (the other 50 bags, which would be sold in the Global Pinoy bazaar scheduled on Nov 5-6).

On the first week of October, Business Partner said he won't be able to deliver the bags because Uncle Buck wasn't able to make the bags because of Typhoon Pedring. Bulacan--where the leather was bought--was flooded. This was 10 days before delivery date. I had given the money weeks before Pedring ravaged Luzon. There had been plenty of time to buy leather before the floods. More important than "where are the bags?" is the question "where was the money?"

Business Partner said he can deliver some bags third week of October and the rest on October 30. I reiterated to him that, because of the long holiday (All Saints Day, etc), a lot of OFWs had ordered bags because they will be home that first week of November. They didn't want to pay for the expensive shipping costs to whatever country they worked so it was vital that they get their bags while they were here in the Philippines. Business Partner assured me that the bags will be ready by Oct. 30.

On Oct. 30, Business Partner said that there are no bags, that Uncle Buck said the bags will be ready by Nov. 15. I hit the roof. I asked if he could come and deliver whatever bags were ready. After all, if Uncle Buck said he'll have the full order in 2 weeks, surely there were 15, 20, 30 ready. Business Partner replied that it would be a waste of gas to make more than one trip, that it would be better if I just wait for Nov. 15.

That means no bags for the OFWs and no bags for the Global Pinoy bazaar.

I obviously couldn't wait for Nov. 15. So I cancelled the order, informed my customers of what happened, and gave them all their money back. I was so embarrassed and ashamed and furious. I was so upset. I cried for 3 days. Yes, I cried for 3 days! One time, Vince even said I was hysterical. He was alarmed. And if you've been following my blog, you'd remember that my pregnancy was very delicate and that I was ordered by my doctor to be on complete bed rest and to avoid all stress. Believe me, the whole unraveling of the bag business was beyond stressful. It's a good thing I didn't lose the baby.

So what do you think happened? Was it Uncle Buck or was it Business Partner?

I don't even care anymore. Not even about the money. I do care about my name and reputation but I am so happy and relieved that the customers whose orders were undelivered totally understood the situation. Most of them even told me to forget about the whole thing and take care of my health for the baby's sake. Which made me cry again because people are so nice even in the midst of their disappointment.

So now you know why I closed down the satchel business. I learned a LOT, believe you me. One big lesson was don't be stupid and too trusting. Other lessons? Be involved in every single thing. Money changes people, even your friends.

Well, I haven't entirely given up. I did learn another thing about myself from this whole fiasco: I can be an entrepreneur! I can do this! I just need to do things better and smarter next time. And there will be a next time, folks. Like I said, I already have new prospects for suppliers and one of them said they can do an even better job at making handmade leather bags, with more colors and faster delivery and maybe even cheaper (but the leather will be from China).

So I'm still excited! I have designs lined up! I'm just waiting for Wiggle to come out but I'll take care of him for a few months, make sure he's fantastic, then I'll be back in the bag business saddle. And it's going to be much better this time. Just you wait!

What I want this 2012: a new bed!

Except that it might have to be a king since Vince, Vito and I all tumble into one bed and the little big boy takes up too much space (seriously, how can someone so tiny take up so much space?!). Now another baby boy is on his way and we'll need a new bed.

Last month, I was finally able to visit Ronac Art Center. I know everyone raves about it so I was a tad disappointed that I didn't see any art. I was kinda expecting it to be a museum or a gallery, not a mini mall. Oh well. I still liked the place, especially when I discovered the Uratex beds!

I actually was in the premises for an event but the event was running suuuuuper late because some celebrities must've gotten the memo that the affair starts at 6 instead of 4pm, the time the rest of us were told. At least that's the excuse I always give these celebs. Anyway, I wandered about while waiting and as soon as I saw rows of mattresses, I did this:

Kicked off my heels!

Lay on the beds!

The Uratex memory foam pillows are better than Muji's. And much cheaper!

I tried out all the mattresses! I lay on them, rolled around, bounced. I sure gave Goldilocks a run for her money. I liked the Perfect Serenity mattress best--it's the perfect balance of firm and soft. Some of the mattresses were like sinking into clouds, which is a good thing for some but for me it felt like I was being suffocated. Some of the mattresses were very firm but that's because they're orthopedic. Perfect Serenity was just right.

The best part is the mattresses are not expensive at all! The Perfect Serenity queen is a mere P15,000. I'd have bought it then and there except I remembered I have a husband who must be consulted on purchases above... hmmm. I actually really don't ask Vince for permission to shop because he spoils me like that but I figured that since he'll be sharing the bed I wanted to buy, he had to have a say!

And this is what he had to say: "Let's wait."

The reason is we had just bought a major piece of furniture (I won't say what it is!) so he advised me from buying yet another one, even if the bed doesn't cost as much as the aforementioned major piece of furniture. Good idea. So we'll wait. But Perfect Serenity mattress, I'm coming for you soon!

Why I'm scared of the BlackBerry

My phone fell twice in the toilet last year so it's been dying on me. I've been asking people on Facebook what phone to get for months now. I always get very passionate answers on why I should get the phone they think I should get. I noticed that people in the creative fields (arts, publishing, etc) said, "iPhone!" and the rest of the world said, "BlackBerry!" Since I'm a magazine editor and a writer, the answer is obvious but I still hemmed and hawed.

Before I could decide on it, my office decided for me and gave me a BlackBerry. I think it was ready for pick up by November. But I only remembered to claim it last week. That's almost 2 months of forgetting I have a new phone. And now it's been an entire week since I got the phone. Finally, the Third World Nerd took it out of the box and charged the battery a few hours ago. I still haven't touched it.

It's not that I'm tech-challenged. Part of the reason is I'm really not a phone person. I have two phones--for my Globe (personal line that I've had since 2003) and for my Sun (free from my work). People who know me or work with me get exasperated with me because I seldom answer phone calls, I rarely reply to text messages and I always misplace my phones. For the entire month of November, I forgot to charge my Globe phone. Then I forgot where I kept it for the whole of December until Vince found it under a pile of papers last week.

My phones are almost always on silent so when I misplace them (which is often because my toddler plays with them!), I never could find the damn things. And I never feel the need to look for my phones when they're missing. And when they run out of battery power, I forget to charge them. On weekdays, I almost always ignore my phone after 6pm. On weekends, my phones are forgotten.

But now I have a new BlackBerry. And I am not excited to use it because everyone tells me, "You'll LOVE it! You'll be so ADDICTED to it! You CAN'T LIVE without it!" That enthusiasm makes me very apprehensive. And now I'll confess why.

Late last year, I became addicted to Twitter and Facebook. To my horror, I found that I spend 2-3 hours just refreshing for updates, replying, commenting, sharing, RTing. That's 2-3 hours every single day. That's 2-3 hours a day that I could've spent reading a book, reading the magazines (a year's subscription to Vanity Fair, Glamour and Allure!) my husband bought for me as a birthday gift, writing, blogging, cooking healthy meals, putting on lotion, deep conditioning my hair, doing my own mani-pedi, seeing friends, sleeping. Sleeping! I could use those extra 2-3 hours of sleep every day dammit! But no. I spend those precious hours on the social networks.

It would've been okay if I earned money from all the Tweeting and Facebooking. But I don't. If you noticed, I don't blog that often anymore. Blame my addiction to social networking. Blogging makes me money and I've neglected it just because I'm stalking people (really, that's what social networks are for). I have to stop. Obviously. I'm not disciplined enough and it's controlling my life.

So just as I resolved to wean myself from Tweets and FB updates, the BlackBerry arrives and everyone says I can now Tweet, update my FB, check my email anywhere and everywhere. "Isn't that so great?!" they trill. That's like giving a recovering alcoholic a free pass to a fully stocked bar.

I'm in trouble.

Happy birthday, Duchess Catherine!

And to celebrate, why don't you pick up the truly fabulous book my friend Tisha Angluben (editor-in-chief of Good Housekeeping and blog author of Hey, Tishie, Tishie) and her staff created:

The gorgeous princess proves that being 30 is love! She looks so much better now than she ever did before, with her wavy locks, super svelte figure and elegant dresses. I thought she was pretty before but she looks smashing now!

Kate and William attended the premiere of War Horse
on the eve of her 30th birthday

A lot of people criticize her figure as too skinny. I don't think so. She looks strong and firm and toned. You can tell if a woman is too thin or just plain unhealthy by her skin and hair--if her skin is sallow and sagging and wrinkly or her hair is dull and thin, then she's obviously not eating well. This can happen to a thin person and to a fat person. Really, it's not your shape that matters, it's your health and fitness! And when you compare Kate's super slim photos now with her curvy photos before, Kate looks much healthier now--all glowy skin and shiny thick hair!

Thanks, Kate, for proving that health and the third decade are fabulous! So to those of you in your teens and 20s dreading your 30s, don't. Life is so much better!

I looked my best at 30, too. Then I got pregnant. Hahaha! And I'm pregnant again, hence the conspicuous absence of self photos lately on my blogs. I kinda don't look very good. Well, everyone says I'm a blooming pregnant woman (thanks, kind souls!) but I know objectively that I'm flabby and swollen. I swear I'll get back to fighting form when all this childbearing is done!

Hmm. I wonder how Kate would look like when she gets pregnant. The prince and his wife said that they'll enjoy a year or two adjusting to married life and royal duties. But we all know that babies are a king's No. 1 priority (especially in this age when royals don't really rule anymore). I, for one, would love to see little princes and princesses! At OK! magazine, our readers just love celebrity kids like Suri Cruise, the Jolie-Pitt kids, the kids of Nicole Richie. I think they'll go berserk when a real royal baby comes along!  

*photos from Zimbio