TOPAZ HORIZON

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Oy naiyak ako. I haven't stared into my husband's eyes since the kids were born. That's almost 5 years. Sometimes I feel like my marriage is under attack from my own kids, simply because their needs are so immediate, constant and urgent that I have no time to nurture my relationship with my husband.


I mean, of course we look at each other. When we're talking. But that's it—we're talking. Or we're minding the kids, or eating, or working, watching TV, or we talk in bed in the dark. But we no longer just bask in each other's presence. There's really no time. We're lucky if we have seconds just to stare at each other. I can't imagine four minutes. Maybe I'll try 30 seconds later.

We have a good marriage, Vince and I, but if we don't watch it, we'll lose sight of each other. I'm going to look at Vince, really look at him, from now on.

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Real Living's website recently published this article on my favorite things at home (click the link to see my list!). The article came out in 2013. Two years later, the items on that list I gave to Real Living are still my favorite things!

Well, except for the favorite appliance. I love my microwave oven now. I refused to buy one for years and years, preferring to heat food on the stove or in the oven. But now that I have three kids, I just can't do it anymore! All the preparation then the pots to wash up after! So because I value my time more than anything now, my microwave oven is my favorite appliance now!

A super favorite thing that endures all these years is the photo wall. I love it. Vince loves it. The kids love it. Everyone who visits our house love it. There are more photos on that wall now. More happiness in my life! What a joy to have a reminder of how blessed I am just because I see this wonderful wall every day!

Every family should have a gallery of beautifully framed photos! You can buy inexpensive but nice picture frames from National Bookstore, Our Home and SM Department Store. That's where we buy ours.What we also do is buy framed prints at furniture shops, take out the generic print and put our photos in. That's the secret to our really nice frames. Or we ask for picture frames for Christmas so that people will get us expensive ones haha. Where else can we buy gorgeous photo frames?

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I seriously thought I wouldn't make it in time for our first ever #TopazReads book club meet because I was sick and then my whole family (husband and three babies!) got sick. I just didn't have the time or the energy to read Sophia Amoruso's bestselling book, #GIRLBOSS. Not to say it was a difficult read. It's actually a really easy, fast read. I just had a tough past few weeks, but I finally finished the book!

Sophia is the young woman who founded the e-commerce site Nasty Gal and built it in a few short years to a fashion empire worth millions of dollars. She wrote #GirlBoss to talk about that fantastic story and to inspire other #GirlBosses and would-be #GirlBosses. I picked up the book because I liked the cover. I'm not a dainty girl, I have a dirty mouth, and I like to stand with my hands on my hips. Sophia looked like a woman I'd get along with and I wanted to know her story. Thanks to my sister-in-law, Anj, who gave me this book for Christmas, I did!

Okay, my thoughts: #GirlBoss feels like a blog. The good thing about that is it's friendly and easy to read. The bad thing about that is the "Yey for girl power!" voice robs Sophia of authority. She grew Nasty Gal in her 20s (she's just 30 years old now) so she sounds very young and very excited. But her voice lacked gravitas. I hate to say that because this is a woman who is a massive success. You can't argue with that fact!

I guess my problem with #GirlBoss is it didn't know what it was supposed to be: an autobiography or a business book. It was both but it was too conversational to be business and too business-like to be a memoir. For example, the book rambles on and on about how she couldn't keep a job and how she never had enough money and then POW! She's making $150,000 a day!

Despite that feeling, I did enjoy the book mostly because she sounded a lot like me when I was in my 20s. Some quips I liked:

On how her eBay account became huge: "I also responded to every single comment that anyone left on my page. It just seemed like the polite thing to do. Many companies were spending millions of dollars trying to nail social media, but I just went with my instincts and treated my customers like they were my friends." p. 29

This is how I grew my blogs, too! Well, I didn't respond to EVERY comment (maybe I should!) but many of my friends now are people I met because of my blogs, simply because I had conversations with them. Then they linked me, shared my posts, blogged about me. That's how you succeed in anything really—build good relationships!

On shitty jobs: " I approached them with a sense of tourism and experimentation... I was just going to see where things went. When you approach everything as if it's a big, fun experiment, then it's not that big a deal if things don't work out." p. 65

Totally agree with this. Us Pinoys kasi are poor so our parents hammer into our brains, "What will you do for the rest of your life? Get a job that you will hold for at least 20 years. Marry a suitable person by 25. Have kids. Be happy." So committed!!! You all know I took my time! And while I loved my magazine job, I've realized now that it's just a job and if a job ends, it's not the end of my life. It was fun, blogging is fun, freelance writing is fun, but, hey, if it doesn't work out, then no tears, no fears! (I can't say this about marriage and motherhood, though. You have to make it work!)

On saving: "When your time spent making money is significantly greater than your time spent spending money, you will be amazed at how much you can save without even really thinking about it." p. 109

So true. I earn a lot less now than when I was employed but I have more savings now because I'm too busy being a mother and any spare time I get, I spend on work!

On spending: "You can't act like you've arrived when you're only receiving the invitation." p. 110

Translation: Don't buy anything you can't afford.

On keeping out negativity (especially nega people) out of your life: "When you think about people, you give them power." p. 126

Again, so true! I spent a lot of time hating people when I was younger. I may not care what they thought of me but I did wish them dead. All that hate and anger just made me ugly and unpleasant! Meanwhile, these people I hated, their lives flourished! When I decided to forgive and focus on the good, my life changed. Don't let the people who hate you, have hurt you, or the people you envy stay in your mind and your heart. Their presence will grow and grow till you can't function anymore! Kick them out!

On challenges: "Dive headfirst into things without being too attached to the results. When your goal is to gain experience, perspective, and knowledge, failure is no longer a possibility." p. 138

It's good to have goals, of course. But very specific goals (like, "I'll be head of the department at 25, own my house by 26, married at 27, have kids at 28, and retire at 30!") tend to become a to-do list. You focus too much on ticking things off the list that you forget to slow down, savor the climb to success, build friendships, take a look at the people around you. I did that ("I'll be EIC of a magazine at 32!" I became one at 30.), ticked off boxes, and failed to spend time with my mother. She's dead now so that's one regret I'll always have.

Okaaaaay, there's a lot more quotes by Sophia that I liked, but I also want to share this quote from one of the other #GirlBosses that Sophia featured in her book:

Alexi Wasser of IMBOYCRAZY.com: "I found that by sharing my personal experiences, like through my blog, we're not alone—that the most shameful, personal, specific things you're going through are actually universal. You can laugh about it. I want to make a contribution that matters, and I want to be as vulnerable and raw as possible so other people feel less alone."

That's how blogging is for me!

So! Did anyone else read #GirlBoss by Sophia Amoruso? If yes, kindly leave your thoughts on the book in the comments section below. At 11 p.m. tonight, I'll be online for 30 minutes to respond to every comment and if you're also online, we can actually have a conversation! Do come chat with me tonight!

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My inbox is flooded with press releases and ads of brands' new collections and campaigns. And I dunno... I'm not a fan of this denim overkill.

Calvin Klein

Tommy Hilfiger

Colcci

Mango

Diesel

But, hey, if you look good in denim overdose, then don't let me stop you! I'd do it, too, if I looked as good as any of the models above!


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Posted this over at my Instagram because I am sooo in love with my new Transitions® Signature™ Lenses!

My new glasses are red and the lenses are ultra thin, non-reflecting, shatter-proof, and has UV protection. I got Transitions lenses. They don't just have a protective coating, they actually darken when exposed to sunlight. The stronger the light, the darker they get! Will review on the blog soon. I need to get out of the house first to see how the lenses work! 😎☀️😄

A photo posted by Frances (@francesasales) on Jan 10, 2015 at 9:57pm PST

Because I'm nearsighted, I've been wearing glasses for 25 years. It's safe to say that I have a huge interest in all things glasses. For many people, glasses are just an accessory. For me, my life depends on them! So anytime I see an ad on eyewear or an article on lens technology or optical shop sales, I am there!

Last year, I was so excited when Transitions® Signature™ Lenses approached me and said they're here in the Philippines! I have longed for lenses that react to sunlight for the longest time! Transitions® Signature™ lenses are the most responsive adaptive lenses, developed from Transitions Optical’s latest patented Chromea7™ technology and tested with an exclusive measurement methodology, Life360™. Lots of big names and patents and trademarks there, no?! This is because these lenses are the BEST!!!

And now I own a pair!!!

I'm so lucky!
3. Because they react to the strength of the sun's rays, you get different levels of darkness. So if it's cloudy, it darkens a little lang. If the glare is super bright, didilim talaga siya. So kahit pabago-bago pa ang weather (sunny one minute, then cloudy the next) at kahit saan ka pa magpunta (lunch out tapos biglang papasok sa dark building), you won't need to remove your glasses.


HOW DO I USE IT?

When I suggested a book club over at my Facebook page and Instagram, I got enthusiastic support from a few readers. Like, maybe three readers haha but that's okay! I figured it's easier to discuss a book with a few people than say a hundred, right, so here it is! I'm officially announcing the first ever book for the #TopazReads book club: #GirlBoss by Sophia Amoruso.


I'm in the middle of it now and I won't spoil my review but I will tell you a bit about the book.

#GirlBoss is the autobiography of Sophia Amoruso, so, yeah, it's a non-fiction book. Sophia is the CEO of Nasty Gal, a multi-million dollar clothing company that started on eBay selling stolen goods. Wait. What? Yes, she was a thief and that's why I wanted to read it—I wanted to know how someone who used to be a crook reformed herself and got rewarded by millions of dollars! I like that the straight-and-narrow road has financial rewards.

The book came out last year and enjoyed success because—and this is my opinion—there were books like Lean In and celebrities like Emma Watson and social media movements like #YesAllWomen. I am all for feminism and raising awareness on women empowerment so I was happy to choose a book that puts "girl" and "boss" in its title. I just hope it's a good book!

So anyway! That's all I'll say now. The book review will be published here on Feb. 16, Monday. Then I'll be online at 11 PM to chat with you live. Well, if any of you are still awake at that time! Sorry, readers, I'm a mama and I can only work late at night! My guess is no one will chat with me haha.

To participate in the live chat, just visit TopazHorizon.com on Feb. 16, Monday, read my review, then leave your questions/reactions/agreements/disagreements on the comments section. At 11pm (+8 GMT), I will go live and reply to every comment that I publish. If you're online at the same time, we can have a real chat! The chat will last just 30 minutes because it's already rather late in the night, but I think it will be fun!


So please pencil the date in your calendars and see you back here on Monday, Feb. 16, for the very first #TopazReads edition!

#GirlBoss by Sophia Amoruso is available at Fully Booked.

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Help meeeee!

I really really want a personal carafe on my bedside table (because for the first time in all my 38 years, I now have a bedside table!). I get so thirsty in the middle of the night sometimes. I have a KOR water bottle, which is really nice, but now that I have a bedside table, I really think a carafe should be on it! I like the bedside ones, it's just a small bottle with a cover that doubles as a drinking glass. I just don't know where to buy a nice one.

I found a few on eBay:



I like them all, but I do like Drink Me best because I'm an Alice in Wonderland fan. Trouble is all these carafes are abroad. If I do buy one, I'm afraid it will get broken while it's on its way to me!

Does anyone know where I can buy one here in Manila? Thanks!!!

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Today, I'm giving my readers the very first guest post on Topaz Horizon. Ever. This contributor has actually written three guest posts on Topaz Mommy so he's no stranger to my blogs. Everyone, please welcome Vince Sales. I'm okay with him writing on my blog because I have this massive crush on him. But don't tell him that! (Photo captions are mine.)

Well, technically, in City of Dreams.



May budget!!! Vanity Fair says each actor was paid $13 million for this series of Scorsese-directed ads for the spankin' brand new casino by the bay. Wow. I did not know First World levels na pala ang Pinas! I'm thrilled and flabbergasted and shocked and in disbelief and wowed and amazed and horrified all at the same time!

But DiCaprio and de Niro and Scorsese! What. The. What! I'm suddenly wanting to go to City of Dreams!

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I cried. It's so good! And I miss #GoT.

Put your volume on full blast and take a listen.



My brother, Theodore, who is the cellist (and big boss) of Manila String Machine (the hottest string quartet in the country!!!), also have #GoT on their repertoire but they should totally do a video like this!

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My favorite look at the Golden Globes 2015 red carpet was Emma Stone's Lanvin jumpsuit.

Absolutely stunning that girl is. Just breathtaking, I also loved the looks of Diane Kruger, Ellie Kemper and Felicity Jones. But my favorite look, right after Emma's, is Naomi Watts in her yellow Gucci dress, Bulgari snake neckpiece, and red lip.
I love yellow on the red carpet. Anyone who wears yellow just pops out of that ruby floor. But yellow is tricky to wear because if you choose the wrong shade, your skin will look sallow or the yellow won't photograph well.

That problem is not a problem with these beauties:
In 2007, new mom (well, birth mom) Angelina Jolie took a break from her black wardrobe to surprise everyone at Cannes in this uncharacteristically sunny Ungaro.

Emma again standing out on the red carpet and so perfect in last year's Amazing Spider-Man promo tour. Soooo in love with this Atelier Versace dress with a million tiny pleats.
 
In 2006, Michelle Williams looked so delicate and feminine in Vera Wang. This dress was supposed to be a canary yellow but in photos, it always looks orange!

My favorite yellow look of all time is Reese Witherspoon's yellow Nina Ricci cocktail dress which she wore in 2007 while in the midst of divorcing Ryan Phillippe. You'd never think she was going through a tough time looking at how perfect she was here!

In fact, I loved Reese's look soooo much, she was my peg for this dress and photo!

Walang aangal. Walang kokontra! Pagbigyan niyo 'ko!

Yes, as in pagkakita ko kay Reese, I went out and asked my mother-in-law's kusturera to make a version of that dress (with Vince's design input since back then, childless me had the flattest chest so the sweetheart neckline won't work)!

Yellow is so unexpected, that's why it gets attention. Sigh. Must bring the sunshine back to my dreary mommy wardrobe of grays and blacks!

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I already bought The Day Designer planner for 2015 but I really like the mission of Coffee Bean & Tea Leaf when it comes to their 2015 Giving Journal, so I wanted to help them promote it. And it's a really nice planner, too! Let me tell you a bit about its story before I do my review and giveaway.

The Coffee Bean & Tea Leaf (CBTL) 2015 Giving Journal is all about "Overflow and Giving Back." I know the owners of CBTL are Christians so I'm making a wild guess that they're basing their planner's mission on the famous Psalm 23:

The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want. He makes me lie down in green pastures. He leads me beside still waters. He restores my soul. He leads me in paths of righteousness for his name's sake. Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me. You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies; you anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows. Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life, and I shall dwell in the house of the Lord forever.

With the Giving Journal to help you plan your year, you can achieve goals and make dreams come true. When that happens and blessings abound, then your cup overflows and it is time to give back and share. It's really quite noble and true. Life takes on so much meaning and joy when you're sharing your life with others. A lot of us will say, "But I have nothing to give." We all have something! Time for our kids, talents for the community, hugs for our friends, smiles for the salespeople or maintenance staff, a sandwich to split with a co-worker, making a cup of coffee for your sleepy spouse. We always are blessed! We just need to see that God provides!

Every year, during the holidays, CBTL releases its Giving Journal, which benefits the Real LIFE Foundation. Since 2008, the company has raised more than P10 million and created awareness for Habitat for Humanity and Real LIFE Foundation. Poor but deserving scholars are given scholarships for high school and college. These scholars are also given LIFE coaching, where mentors help equip these kids with the values and skills they will need to succeed in the real world.

Pretty amazing, right? Create a life of abundance so your life overflows in love and service to others! I'm sure The Giving Journal can help. Let me do my review:

I like that the owner's info sheet is simple and easy to read. And large. Madaling hanapin at basahin.

The whole planner, by the way, has lots of these bold and graphic patterns and designs. All earthy colors. I am not an earthy color person. I like bold colors like pink and orange and red and blue or just bold black and white. So this color scheme doesn't appeal to me.

Then comes the pages of info about the brand. Can't be helped. It is a product of Coffee Bean & Tea Leaf so might as well find out about the name behind the planner.

Then the information about The Giving Journal and how to use it for maximum results follows.

A page for your year's goals. I always like it when my plans are in one page in my planner. I am reminded every day of what my year's supposed to be like and I can then plan every decision and event purposefully.

Only thing I don't like about this is three of the boxes are dark brown. Even if you use black ink to write your goals, mahirap basahin.

Two pages on how to create an abundant life. Very good and helpful suggestions. Some are so simple, which is a good reminder to us all that improving our life needs just small and simple steps.

Vacation planner sheets for those getaways we all need.

Coupons! Sobrang sulit the coupons! Daming free! So if you're a CBTL fan (like me!), you'll be super happy with the offers and deals in The Giving Journal.

Okay, planner pages! They're very simple. Every month starts with a calendar. Love the simple layout. Thank goodness they didn't put those earthy colored graphics here. I don't want to be distracted from my schedule by patterns!

I truly love love love this weekly layout, where the week is on one side and the other side is for your To Do list. I've been using this kind of planner for years. It's more flexible than a daily planner (which I'll be trying out for 2015) but more detailed than a monthly layout.

There are two kinds of notes pages—a dotted one alternating with a blank one. Helpful advice and inspiration is found at the bottom of each notes page.

After 52 weeks, you get a congratulatory note. Hey, everyone who survives life needs to be congratulated! Then blank pages follow, which I always find useful for ideas, notes, drawings and photos.

The last few pages are for helpful information.

The inside back cover has a pocket for receipts and other odds and ends. I think all planners should have a pocket!

What I loved:

1. The cover material. 
2. The planner pages. They're simple. Like I said, I want to be focused on my plans so I like that there's no distracting graphics.
3. No extra unnecessary stuff like measurements, time zones, phases of the moon, etc. 

I wanted to tell everyone to buy my Topaz Clutch for gifts this Christmas but this was why I couldn't:

I hope Ni-QUA stocks up soonest! Thank you for all your support for this fun brand collaboration, my dearest readers and friends! Mwah! You have been more than amazing to me this year. God bless you!

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