TOPAZ HORIZON

A month ago today, the boy who changed my life forever celebrated his 8th birthday. The great thing about having many kids is you have an instant party anytime, all the time, but especially at celebration time. And a birthday is always a party at our house!


Three little boys so happy to celebrate! I love these three kiddos. They are the happiest little creatures I've ever met. Reminds me not to be so serious.


For his birthday, all Vito wanted was a rainbow cake and a day at Kidzania. So that's what we did. We got him a Red Ribbon rainbow cake that I decorated with Minecraft icing buttons and candy confetti. And we trooped to Kidzania so the boys can pretend to be grownups for a day.

And maybe that's the first sign he's not a little boy anymore.

Here he is quietly contemplating his birthday wish as we all loudly sing him his birthday song. Thinking about his wish is the only time his face grows serious. I wonder what he was thinking of at this very moment. We never ask. A birthday wish is the only secret they can keep, I tell them. And they usually do keep it to themselves but blurt it out anyway hours after.


This year, Vito didn't reveal his birthday wish. We never ask, remember? But this year, because he didn't say anything to me at all, I couldn't help it. A few days later, I finally asked. "What did you wish for when you blew out your birthday candle?" "I didn't wish for anything, Mama," he said. "I already have everything I want." *heart melts* "Everything?" "Well," he finally said. "I want more Skylanders but I can ask those from Santa."

He still believes in Santa. Vito still believes in Santa Claus! He's still my little boy!


Look at that boy. How did I ever make such a perfect child? He's a reminder every day of how good life is, how our family is a celebration of love and grace, how blessed I am. All I have to do is just look at him and his brothers. But I'm usually too focused on chores, work, getting things done... And so I forget.

Look at that boy, I say to myself when I finally look up from all I need to do as a mother. Just look at him. And never forget how amazing life has been especially these past 8 years.

Happy birthday, my sunshine! You are our joy forever!

It's always party season in our side of the world but when the -ber months come rolling around, there's a party almost every other day! Hello, September! And I'm already getting lots of invites to events. Now that my kids are in school, I have a little time now so I'm going to try to attend all (?!) the parties I'm invited to. It's always nice to see old friends and meet new ones!

An unforgettable invite from IG: @theinspirationseekers C and L

I noticed everyone sends save-the-date notices and invitations through Facebook Events these days, and it may be because I'm from the 20th century but I really seriously frown on that. For really special occasions (like weddings!), the invitation should be sent over mail or handed over personally. The invitation tells your guests so many things. Aside from the who, what, when and where, it also tells your guests if it's a formal affair or a fun get-together, if they need to dress up or dress down, if it's a social media moment or if it's strictly private. The invitation sets the stage for the event to come and should therefore be thought out and delivered with care.

Because I'm such a fan of "Shop for anything online!", let me tell you about this amazing website I'm currently crushing on. It's BasicInvite.com! I just discovered it last week and I'm going over everything, not for party invites, but for design inspiration for a possible blog makeover. Basic Invite lets it possible for you to create truly custom invitations—no art director or artist needed. Just look at these pretty samples:

This picture is making me all sentimental and gooey inside. I took this photo for my BabyLove diaper review just a few months ago, when we started toilet training in earnest. It was Piero's third summer and we really hoped he'd be potty-trained before his fourth birthday. Sure enough, before we even finished the pack of diapers—I didn't realize it would be his very last!—Piero was using the toilet and he's strutting around now like a big boy. "I peed in the toy-wet, mama!"

And now I see this photo, a photo of his last days as a baby, and it makes me so emotional!!! As in naiyak ako, mamas. Kainez. I was surprised at my reaction. I have been so ready for the kid stage and so proud Piero went through potty training like a champ, but now that it's here, I guess I'm also wistful for the baby days.

But not wistful enough to want another baby! Nope. I am done! I am finished! I never have to do potty training again! Here's a short post on our tips on how we toilet-trained our three boys (because, yes, I can finally claim to be an expert!):

1. Watch for child's readiness.
I know babies can be potty-trained, and by babies, I mean 2 months old to less than a year old. But doctors say that is not a good idea at all. You can protest all you want but I'm going with the medical experts. Pediatric urologist Steve J. Hodges, MD, advocates for late potty training. His recommended age is 3 years old. Because any earlier than that is harmful. He writes in parenting website, Babble, "It’s typically the kids who trained earliest and most easily who develop the most serious problems. I see about 100 kids a week at my clinic, and about half are dysfunctional voiders; most of them trained before 3." Read his eye-opening article here: The Dangers of Potty Training Too Early.

How do you know a child is ready? When she can say she's ready, when she can run to the toilet and sit on it herself, and when she can pull down and pull up her underwear herself. So what does that mean? A child is ready for potty training when she can talk, walk, and have enough motor skills to not fall into the toilet bowl and manage the business of underwear on her own. Depending on your child, that could be anywhere from 2 to 3 years old.

Our kids were toilet-trained at these ages: Vito at 4 years and 2 months old, Iñigo at exactly 3 years old, and Piero at exactly 4 years old. We waited for their readiness, and because they were raring to do it, too, we were done in about 3 days, with hardly any mess and dismay.

2. Be ready yourself!
A few years ago, I was talking to a taxi driver while we were stuck in traffic. He was complaining about his kid, who had a kid herself. "Limang taong gulang na anak niya, hindi pa rin nagbabanyo mag-isa. Paano, tinatamad yung anak kong turuan yung anak niya!" So there, mga mommies. Kapag handa na si baby, kailangang handa na rin kayo!

Yes, while there are parents who are very eager to get their kids out of diapers, there are also parents on the other end of the spectrum. Many times parents are loathe to potty-train because it will be messy. They just don't want to deal with the mess and the frustration. As a former preschool teacher, I can attest to the many times a parent has asked, "Do you toilet train the kids as part of the curriculum?" O.M.G. talaga. Toilet training is a parent's job, guys.

I have a list of what to prepare when you're in the toilet-training stage to help you deal better with the mess and accidents. Click here!

3. Buy fun underwear.

4. Try training pants.
Now that you've made your child excited to wear big-boy briefs or big-girl panties, you can help train them with the pull-down/pull-up movement with training pants. Training pants are diapers that have an elastic waistband. This makes it easier for your child to pull down his diaper when he needs to go the toilet. It also helps him feel secure because if accidents do happen, the mess will be contained in the training pants and can be discarded. It's easier for both the child and the parent (or yaya).

In our case, we only used training pants with Piero, our last child. That's how I know it really helps ease the anxiety and frustration of everyone involved in this messy business. I mean, we were able to toilet train Vito and Iñigo without training pants but with Piero, everyone was more relaxed. We used BabyLove Premium Gold Pants. Piero calls them "dia-pants" and these training pants definitely made the whole potty-training episode a happy affair. Plus, he loved his dia-pants so much, he was almost sorry when he realized he didn't need them anymore! Try the BabyLove Premium Gold Pants, mamas. Topaz Mommy approved!

5. Reward successful attempts.
It's important to be wildly happy about every successful trip to the toilet, mamas. Like, make it a HUGE deal. "Oh my goodness, you peed in the toilet! I'm so happy! Are you happy? Did that make you feel like a big boy? I bet! I can't wait for you to do that again! Good job!" Yes, that wildly happy.

Another thing they respond positively to is rewards. Whether it's a sticker on a chart or a small toy, you two decide. With Vito, he had to be motivated by Lego minifigs. With Iñigo, he was just happy with the praise. I mean, we had toys ready for him, too, but he was happier with the hugs and kisses. With Piero, he asked for a big toy—a Pacific Rim Jaeger action figure that we had to order all the way from China. So he was determined to learn to use the toilet quickly.

And of course, never punish a child for accidents. Don't even express disappointment. Always be encouraging. I know some parents get angry and say things like, "You're such a baby! You're so dirty!" And they spank the child for every time he or she doesn't get to the toilet on time. The child then learns to control his or her peeing and pooping out of fear. I've read research indicating that punishing a child during toilet training may result to two things: when the child grows up, he or she becomes sexually frigid or sexually deviant. The now-adult associate their sexual organs with filth, anger, and disappointing the important people in their life. So they either cannot feel sexual pleasure or they will only want sex that not normal. So please please please make potty training a positive experience!!!

Aaaaand there you go, mamas! My top toilet-training tips for that exciting, frustrating and messy time in you and your toddler's life!

Now, if you need diapers to contain the mess, help train your kid, or because your child's not ready yet for undies, there's a Shopee BabyLove Fair happening now till August 29, 2018. The promo says diapers are up to 50% discounted! Plus, you get a chance to get a bag of diapers for only P99. Those are big savings! Shop here!!!

I've always known since I got pregnant with my first child, Vito, that he isn't mine. I'm his forever and ever but he belongs to someone else and I'm only here to take care of him until he's ready to be with that someone else. With my next sons, Iñigo and then Piero, I knew that same truth.

So today I went to the mall to buy a prepaid SIM card for me, and also get new glasses for me, and shop for me. It was an errand FOR ME. But I get there and I saw this jar of M&Ms chocolate spread and of course I bought it because I got so excited to see my kids try it. And I also got milk tea because my kids love milk tea (never mind that my backpack was suddenly 2 kilos). And then I got new shirts for my husband because wala lang. And then I checked out bedsheets because my sons said they love hotel sheets.

I'm finally done making my blog's media kit for 2019! I usually make a media kit around August, then email them to agencies and brands at around September to October. I get polite, noncommittal replies throughout November. Nothing in December. But by January, I get proposals na.

My mama readers ask me now and then if my kids have chores and if I reward them for doing their chores. Here's the answer: My kids have chores. Since they're still young, their chore list isn't long, just the usual (make your bed, pack away your toys, help set and clear the table, put away your shoes).

For chores, they don't get rewards. For doing homework, no rewards, either. We believe that kids shouldn't be rewarded for things they have to do. But for things they don't have to do but do anyway (like shine shoes that aren't theirs, wash the car), yes, we reward them with either money or treats.

Congratulate me, mamas. I am finally done with the baby stage! With my youngest boy, Piero, finally out of diapers, we are now truly in the kid stage. That means I'm dealing with tons of sweat, a life that revolves around school, my kids making their own friends, and lots of briefs in the laundry basket. A new life indeed!


People tell me all the time, "Aww don't you miss having a baby?" Nope. I loved having babies, of course. I loved the toddler stage. What I love most? I love that it's done! Having gone through it three times and over 8 years (EIGHT YEARS), I am so happy to move on! Just thinking of full diapers, dealing with poop every single morning, toilet-training and I know I'm done with babies. If I could, I'd throw a massive party saying good-bye to that phase in my life!

After three kids successfully out of diapers, I think I'm qualified to give tips on toilet-training. So I will! For today, let me share the tools you'll need when you're in this oh-so messy stage in your child's life. Here's what you need:

1. Training pants
I can't tell you enough how surprised I was at how training pants really work! I only tried training pants with my third little boy. I honestly didn't think they were necessary because we didn't use them with my first two boys.

But I discovered BabyLove Premium Gold Pants (because Piero liked the baby on the packaging) and so we gave training pants a try and—my goodness!—it worked! It worked because it made Piero get used to the pulling down and pulling up action whenever he needed to use the toilet. He also liked that the BabyLove "diapants" made him feel secure, that he could have accidents a little. It wasn't traumatizing at all. So he didn't feel panicky when he had to go because if he leaked a little, the diapants will catch it, and yet because he knew the diapants were easy to pull down, he was willing to run to the toilet.

If you want to try BabyLove Premium Gold Pants, there's a sale on Shopee right now till Sunday. Click here to shop!

2. Wipes
Ah yes, a mother's best friend! You're going to need this near you at all times in case of accidents and to wipe the toilet seat clean.

3. Target
This is for little boys learning to pee. It's hard for them to control the angle of their pee and they also get surprised at how it comes out. Remember, they've always peed in a diaper so they've never actually seen their pee coming out of their penis. So expect them to watch their pee coming out instead of focusing on keeping their pee in the toilet!

What can help is putting a colorful target in the bowl. You can use one Fruit Loop floating on the water. Other moms put a sticker just above the water line. It's easily peeled off after a few flushes.

4. Paper towels
Rags will do, too. You'll need to wipe pee and poo off the floor or the toilet seat or chubby thighs in case of accidents.

The last few days when Piero was still wearing diapers announced on Facebook!

5. Antibacterial soap and alcohol
Potty training is a messy business. When I potty-trained my second boy, Iñigo, I got bad diarrhea for 6 weeks and had to see a gastroenterologist for relief. I'm afraid I was careless with washing and disinfecting my hands. I'm glad it happened to me instead of one or all of the kids!

6. Spray bottle with diluted bleach
7. Pads
These are for your child's bed. I put one under the fitted sheet so that in case my little boy pees in his sleep, the mattress is protected.

8. Pail
This is for rags and briefs and other clothing that need to be washed. Just throw them in so you can attend to them later.

9. Rewards
Toys always work! Especially with my first son, Vito. He got a Lego minifig after each pee and poo appointment haha Toys get the kids excited, knowing a little toy is waiting for them when they successfully use the toilet.

10. Lots of patience!
Every child is different. My kids were toilet-trained "late." Vito at 4 and 2 months, Iñigo at 3 years old exactly, and Piero at 4 years old exactly. Many parents think a child should be toilet-trained before a year old. I think some things should be determined by the child's readiness. Weaning, starting on solid food, walking, potty training. If you wait until the child's ready, potty training is done in 3 days and it's so painless and not so messy because the child is excited to become a big boy. If you force a child, potty training can take a loooooong time, and be full of frustration and accidents and misunderstandings.

So be patient for your child to be ready and be patient when you're going through potty training. Your patience will be rewarded with a happy and accomplished child!

Okay, I hope my list of essential toilet-training tools helped you, mamas! Do try BabyLove Premium Gold Pants. Take advantage of the Shopee sale happening right now till Sunday. Click here to shop!


*This post was brought to you by BabyLove.

My littlest boy isn't so little anymore. Suddenly, this July, when he turned 4, he decided he was ready for school and he was going to use the toilet "like a big boy." All throughout summer, he insisted he wasn't going to do any of that because "I am still a baby, Mama. I'll always be your baby, right?"

So we thought, okay, no pressure, he can stay our baby for one year more. But we don't know what happened. Maybe the birthday triggered it but Piero changed his mind and we're so happily surprised this whole of July! What a gift to us that he made us so proud!


My darling Piero. This is his tiny birthday party at 6 o'clock in the morning. It was a weekday so his older brothers had school and had to go.

I wanted to celebrate properly after school—with all of us dressed for the pictures, the table set, the gifts out, more time. But the boys woke up shouting, "Happy birthday, Piero!" "Is my birthday, Mama!" "Where's the cake?" "Where my gifts?" "What's your wish?" "I'm 4! I'm FOH!!!"


Sooooo... We just had to do the tiniest party we've ever done as the sun was rising on a most wonderful day!

That blurry image to the right is my hand trying to get him away from his candle. That boy. He always gives me a heart attack. But that's his gift to me: the gift of endless surprise and humility.

We had Piero because we thought ourselves so amazing at this parenting gig. But Piero—a surprising combination of Vince and myself in temperament and wilfulness—showed us that every child is different, and what we may think we can't handle just requires a change of thinking, a firmer resolve to try again, and that humility before your own children is always best if you want to have a good relationship with them.


Piero's also given his brothers the gift of patience and understanding. And though he is always annoying them, they are protective of him, always thinking of him, always adoring him. And also always annoying him! They bicker like an old married couple, day in, day out. I don't even know if they actually enjoy fighting each other since they do it a lot.


But they love him, that they do. They always wanted a baby and so we gave them Piero and they always dote on him. They think he's their baby.

For his birthday, they told me and their Papa what Piero wanted. They shopped for his gifts. They counted down the days. They chose and bought the cake. They made him so excited for his birthday! They are the best kuyas. They are a gift to Piero, too.


Happy birthday, dearest darling baby boy! You are what our family needed. You are the happiest baby we've ever known. You are thunder and sunshine and kaiju and jaeger and passion and tenderness  and a gift. We love you so very much! May you grow in wisdom and love, may you always have that fire in you, that stubborn will, that quick laugh, that sharp wit, and that fierce love for me.

Happy birthday, dearest bunchokoykoy! God bless you for always and always!

I'm a silent follower of baonserye and bento box groups on Facebook and Instagram, but I'm just an observer. I'm inspired and I like noting down baon ideas and combos but actually putting together a bento box for my kids? Not really into that.

So when I made this last week at the bento box making workshop by Gold Seas Tuna and Bento By Kat, I was honestly so surprised that I enjoyed making the baon! Behold: My first ever bento box baon!


Gold Seas Tuna Chunks, which I discovered last year and got forever hooked, has the best canned tuna. Meaty, chunky, masarap, fresh. Gold Seas Tuna Chunks also throws the best parties! Intimate, fun, educational, and laging masarap and plentiful ang pagkain. I love this tuna!

Tuna is rich in Omega 3 and protein so it's a healthy and light meat for families to enjoy. What makes me like Gold Seas Tuna Chunks specifically? Here are my reasons:

I don't know how to dress for rainy weather. Yep, that's all you'll find out in this edition of OOTDs from last week. So if you can share tips on how to look fashyon in stormy, windy, flooded to the calves, muddy, and yet hot and humid weather, do tell!
 

Zara shirt, Topshop pants, Mango ballet flats, Kate Spade bag

For a meeting with the L'Oréal team at Lazada (where we shot a promo video for a giant lipstick sale on National Lipstick Day this week), I wore pink trousers to liven up the gray day. I'm usually in black, white, gray and navy, but it's been dark and dreary for weeks now so I wanted to wear something bright.

Casual Chic Manila blouse, Uniqlo jeans, Cole Vintage belt, Dune London loafers

Oh, this was a really stormy day! I went to a Gold Seas Tuna Chunks event and wore blue because that's the Gold Seas brand color (I try to match the brand color to show my support). I wished I wore my rain boots because I was up to my ankles in flood water when I walked the final block home! (Thanks for the ride and the fun chat, Denise of Royal Domesticity!). Plus, I think the water destroyed my loafers. They're a really old pair and I love them because they've become incredibly soft. Oh well.

Topshop shirt and slacks, Skechers sneakers, H&M backpack

I wore this at the start of the week, yung binabagayan ko pa yung weather. Gray everything! I love this outfit. It's soooo comfy.

Uniqlo hoodie and eyelet shorts, Zara knit shirt, Bata flats, H&M backpack

But this is the comfiest! Kasi nakapambahay lang ako! This was the day when classes were suddenly cancelled and we had to rush back to school and get the boys before lunch. So walang ligo, walang suklay, walang makeup, walang bra!!! I just basically threw on a jacket and went! Wag tularan, mamas.

Aaaaand that's all for last week's outfit recap! I'll try to put together a more chic rainy-weather fashion look this week. I dunno if I can do it but you judge next week! Have a good week this week, mamas. Stay safe and dry!