TOPAZ HORIZON

True.

And then there's him:



I never want to close my eyes, darling boy. I just want to drink you in as I pray that God never closes my eyes and make me miss the wonder that is you.

I live in a condo and my bedroom wall is right against the bedroom wall of the neighboring unit. We used to have a very passionate couple as our neighbors and, boy, they made love really noisily. I didn't have to press my ear on the wall behind my bedroom door. We can hear them from our bed from across the room! I used to tell Vince, "Dammit, let's do it and drown them out!"

Well, they moved out some time ago and so, last week, I found a new thing to do with that blank wall: It will be where I keep my necklaces!

Vince doesn't like hammering nails (that's why he bought power tools) so...

... this was a true labor of love.

Tada! So neat and pretty!

I have a lot of necklaces but I never get to use them much because they're all bunched up in a messy bowl. Really terrible. So I edited my collection and decided that I will only keep a dozen. Yes, just 12 pieces! If I want a new necklace, I'll have to get rid of an old one. The simple solution above really helps!

Thank you so much, Vince! I super love you for organizing my life!

P.S. Ok, I found other necklaces buried in my closet this weekend and I couldn't part with them so now I have 2 necklaces per hook! So... just 24 pieces! No more than 24! (Wish me luck!)

Except that it might have to be a king since Vince, Vito and I all tumble into one bed and the little big boy takes up too much space (seriously, how can someone so tiny take up so much space?!). Now another baby boy is on his way and we'll need a new bed.

Last month, I was finally able to visit Ronac Art Center. I know everyone raves about it so I was a tad disappointed that I didn't see any art. I was kinda expecting it to be a museum or a gallery, not a mini mall. Oh well. I still liked the place, especially when I discovered the Uratex beds!

I actually was in the premises for an event but the event was running suuuuuper late because some celebrities must've gotten the memo that the affair starts at 6 instead of 4pm, the time the rest of us were told. At least that's the excuse I always give these celebs. Anyway, I wandered about while waiting and as soon as I saw rows of mattresses, I did this:

Kicked off my heels!

Lay on the beds!

The Uratex memory foam pillows are better than Muji's. And much cheaper!

I tried out all the mattresses! I lay on them, rolled around, bounced. I sure gave Goldilocks a run for her money. I liked the Perfect Serenity mattress best--it's the perfect balance of firm and soft. Some of the mattresses were like sinking into clouds, which is a good thing for some but for me it felt like I was being suffocated. Some of the mattresses were very firm but that's because they're orthopedic. Perfect Serenity was just right.

The best part is the mattresses are not expensive at all! The Perfect Serenity queen is a mere P15,000. I'd have bought it then and there except I remembered I have a husband who must be consulted on purchases above... hmmm. I actually really don't ask Vince for permission to shop because he spoils me like that but I figured that since he'll be sharing the bed I wanted to buy, he had to have a say!

And this is what he had to say: "Let's wait."

The reason is we had just bought a major piece of furniture (I won't say what it is!) so he advised me from buying yet another one, even if the bed doesn't cost as much as the aforementioned major piece of furniture. Good idea. So we'll wait. But Perfect Serenity mattress, I'm coming for you soon!

And it isn't because of my pregnancy. It's because I employed maids since August 2010, Vito's birth month. And the no-housework life has proved to be my body's undoing!

I haven't lived with a maid since I was 13 years old. So that's 20 years of doing everything myself. Even though I say I'm a cluttery person, that's really just in comparison to my ever-so-neat husband. I'm actually pretty clean! So the most difficult thing about parenthood for Vince and me so far had been the fact that we had to hire help. Mahirap makisama, right? Especially if you know how Vince and I are--we're not the sort who make pakisama, but for the past one year and three months, that's what we've been doing.

And now that's over and done with! The yaya and maid left abruptly last Friday. The yaya's eldest daughter abandoned her three kids last week and so yaya had to go home. Since she had no idea how and when that mess would be fixed, she resigned. The maid, who is yaya's niece, has a jealous husband and when he found out that the yaya won't be with the maid anymore, he ordered her to resign as well. So there!

(I'm digressing!)

So this weekend, Vince and I did all the chores--cooking, cleaning, washing up, the laundry--on top of taking care of the baby. Boy, are we tired! But I was surprised when I was doing the laundry and my arms started to hurt by the third article of clothing. The third! How flabby and weak I'd gotten! I used to do full loads of laundry, rinse and rinse again, hang dry, fold and iron, and no muscle ever complained! Well, my back muscles usually, from bending over and over the washing machine, but I'm used to household chores. Rather, I used to be. Now my whole body is screaming in pain!

So I guess I know now what my secret to being slim all these years is--housework! Twenty years of tidying up, scrubbing toilets, doing the laundry, ironing, running to the supermarket, cooking, dusting, polishing have helped keep me trim. And when I stopped doing the chores, my body got fat and flabby fast. I guess this means I better get off my ass then! It will be harder with a toddler and a baby on the way (on top of a career and blogging!) but I can do this!

Even when we do hire help again, I really have to stop depending on the maids. I just don't want this screaming-flabby-muscles thing to happen again. It's alarming actually. So until the new maids arrive, I'll get busy strengthening my body.

Meanwhile, I have a secret weapon: Vince! He's beyond fabulous when it comes to tidying up. There are huge benefits to having a husband who can't stand dirt and disarray and whose favorite thing to do is clean up! I sure am a lucky girl!

I usually write about my family, my son especially, over at Topaz Mommy. I figured that since a lot of single girls with no kids read this blog, you wouldn't be interested. But it's Christmas and I just want to share a little escapade we had at Power Plant recently.

My cutie patooties! This family date was a couple of weeks ago. Since then, Vito had outgrown his uber cool adidas Star Wars Boba Fett shoes, Vince had had a haircut, and I have gotten even more preggy-looking!

Vito checking out the reindeer. Here he said, "Dede!" Funny boy. He doesn't breastfeed anymore--he weaned, on his own, when I got pregnant--but whenever he sees bare chests (men, women and, in this case, animal!), he chuckles and says, "Dede!"

Vito taking in the huge entrance of Toys R Us. I think that is the look of an overwhelmed little boy.

And this is us at Cibo Bimbi. We're trying our hand at coloring. I even bought a sketch book and big, toxic-free crayons after this. But it's a bad idea. I've put away the crayons for when he's a little older and understands that walls, sheets and floors aren't to be colored!

And here's my little boy trying out a plane ride at... you know, I have no idea what the name of that amusement place is. It's the one right beside Bimbi. Anyway, Vito's never been on a ride before and I thought he'd enjoy it...
He did. For two seconds. Then he got dizzy. Poor baby! But he's soooo cute even though he's dizzy!

And there you go! A tiny peek at a day in our life! As you can see, we don't really dress up, we don't bring yaya. I don't even put on makeup or brush my hair! We just have simple family fun. Well, we shop a lot. We used to shop a lot, before Vito. But he's such a handful now that there is just no way for us to go shopping! So we just play and eat and play and eat! That's about two hours then off for home. Life's gotten much simpler but more fun!

In Tagaytay in 2010

I never imagined I'd be typing out that title in the middle of November. By this time usually, the cool weather has descended and everyone's taken out their cardigans and sweaters and scarves and jackets. My uniform this time of the year is usually a dress with opaque tights and a cardi, or jeans and tee with a scarf wrapped around my neck. This year? My dress code is various states of undress!

Well, that's global warming for you. Scary. Sad. Especially since I have to think about what kind of future my kids will have to see!

As for now, all I want to do is escape to a cooler clime. Actually, earlier this month, I had wanted to hit the beach so that I can spend the days with a good reason to be nearly naked. But the sun, oh the sun, it's just too hot! So I've been thinking of either Baguio or Tagaytay.

The last time I visited Baguio was a disaster. Vince and I had met in Baguio in 1999 and went back for a trip down memory lane. I booked us a room in this awful hotel that Lonely Planet had recommended as a good place to stay. I never believed Lonely Planet from then on! Our room had cardboard walls and a bare light bulb. The bathroom's walls didn't reach the ceiling so if you had to do No. 2, well, let's just say we had to go outside and leave the room's door open! There was no hot water (in freezing Baguio!) and, oh wait, there was actually no running water at certain hours of the day.

The last time I went to Tagaytay was for my friend Nikki's wedding. Vince and I stayed at this lovely boutique inn that unfortunately also had thin walls. We were kept up by the owners' kid and friends partying the night away. I was pregnant with Vito then so I was hormonal so I complained very angrily.

So now I guess I want to go back to one or both cities to make happier memories! But since my pregnancy is a bit delicate, Baguio is not an option for now. So I'm looking at Tagaytay. Someone told me that since I have a family, I'm better off renting a log cabin so I Googled some rentals and found these cabins at Tagaytay Highlands:

I can see it now: cold nights, the smell of pine in the air, the cacophony of crickets, then Vince and Vito and I wrapped in warm blankets, feet propped up on rustic log furniture, sipping hot cocoa, reading or chatting or tickling each other.

Sigh! Just looking at those photos already makes me feel better. I wish we can escape the city! Some of my friends have actually made plans to spend Christmas somewhere cold--either Sagada and Tagaytay or abroad in Hong Kong. I am so envious! It would be so lovely to get away from this terrible heat!

*log cabin photos from here.

In exactly 10 days, I'm going to be 35. I find it terribly exciting--the 30s for me has always been a woman's sexiest age, the time when she's most confident, free from the insecurities that the teens and 20s were plagued with. I'm also looking forward to my 40s because that is when I think a woman is at her most powerful. Exciting times!

So what do I want for my milestone?

Well, I do have everything I need. I still have a lot of wants but, as they are wants, they don't bother me so much. But let me just tell you what they are!

Stuff I want:
1. A year's subscription to Glamour and Vanity Fair. Vince already gifted me with these! Thanks, babe!
2. A few days at the beach with my hubby and little boy, plus yaya. I'm not a beach person but what is it about kids that make you want to play in the sun and sand?
3. A year's worth of facials so that my acne will finally go away! Calling all my friends in the beauty industry! Wink, wink!
4. Shopping sprees at Mango, Karimadon, Zara, SM Forum and K&Co.
5. Shopping sprees at Mothercare, SM Baby, Rustan's Baby and Gingersnaps.
6. Red velvet cake from Karen's Kitchen.
7. Carrot cake from my friend Mariel, who I dearly miss and who will not be baking me cakes because she's in NYC.
8. A girly day at a nail salon with my girlfriends, who I also miss. This bed rest is so sad.
9. A MacBook. Either Air or Pro. Still can't decide!
10. An assistant!

Of course I have other less frivolous things on my mind, like...
1. I wish the subchorionic hemorrhage in my uterus would disappear so that my little Wiggle will be safe and I can get out of the house again. I whine a lot about being stuck home but I do that so I don't worry about Wiggle. Sometimes when I'm being shallow, it's really because something else vastly more important is pressing itself against my mind and my heart and I need to set my sights on glittery shiny things to not drown in the darkness.
2. I pray always for the safety, protection and good health of Vince, Vito and myself. And the yaya and maid! I don't think I utter a prayer more often than this one. Protect us, keep us safe, make us invisible to evil, keep us healthy. Sometimes, that's all I say to God. It must be maddening!
3. I wish all the kinks in this bag business will get ironed out. With Uncle Buck old and working slow and the leather supply running out because of the floods in Bulacan, I may have a ton of interested customers but if I can't meet demand... It's just really very frustrating for me.
4. I wish that all our plans for the magazine I edit will go spectacularly well in 2012. We're doing very well actually--both in advertising and circulation--but I want it to be bigger!
5. I want my blogs to become bigger than ever, too. They're actually great--thousands of views, steady growth, steady stream of advertisers and sponsors--but I'm ready to go HUGE.

That's all. I am beyond blessed and I thank God often for the life I have. I worked hard for it, sure, but I believe the right people and the opportunities were also sent my way and that I was smart enough (or I was advised well) to recognize them. And I am happy and completely content. Yet I am ready for more. I'll be 35 soon. In 10 days! I'm ready to do more!

Today, I received an email from a very concerned reader, Amina, who told me that someone named Jamie Palanca is using my photos on her Facebook account and passing them off as her own.

Since I wasn't friends with this woman, I couldn't see her other photos but Amina told me that in the other photos, Ms. Palanca claimed Vito as her own, except that she named him Savannah Lauren. And as you can also see from her comment below, she also claimed Vince as her husband.

Talagang angkinin ang asawa't anak ko, ha!

I am not very upset. This is something unexpected, after all. That's one of the consequences of putting your life all over the Internet. I was telling my friend Jill that it's kinda funny, kinda creepy, kinda flattering (although why did she use that unflattering photo?!) but mostly very sad and pathetic. So, guys, don't worry. I'm cool!

My cousin Diana pointed out, however, that while it's great I'm not blowing my top over this, she said that Ms. Palanca is an online seller. If she happens to be an unscrupulous person (and she very well may be because if she can lie about this then she can lie about anything), then she might be running off with people's money. And then what if a swindled customer saw me or my family somewhere and gets angry and attacks us? Put that way, that is a very scary scenario.

Well, folks, please do me a HUGE favor and report this person. Kindly go to her Facebook page (click here) and, on the left side of the profile, somewhere under the profile pic, click on "Report/Block" and say this person is pretending to be me. Thank you!

P.S. Please don't post harsh words on her wall. I know some of you are very protective of me (thanks!). I think it's a very sad thing she had to do this so let's just wish she finds a great husband and make gorgeous babies and have a fabulous life so that she wouldn't need to pretend to be me!

P.P.S. I wouldn't have known about this if it weren't for Amina. Thank you! You know, despite this, I'm still very glad I blog because I have people all over the world who truly care for me and my family. I am very blessed!

How did we ever get so lucky? Thank You, God!

We went to Bali for a wedding. Jukka, Vince's best man at our wedding, was getting married. It was a surprise wedding since we didn't even know he was dating anyone, let alone dating a girl as gorgeous as his bride!

Well, that's love for you! Even Vince and I had a whirlwind romance—we met April 5, kissed April 18, and he asked me to marry him in May! That was when I got freaked out and said, "Baby, let's take things slooooow from now on." It was so slow, we got married eight years later!

Anyway, here's Jukka. He's very excited to get married to—back then to us—the mystery girl. He kept talking about Michelle and how she's so cute and how he wants to have a family like Vince and have a baby like Vito. Jukka's in love with Vito. I know how he feels.

And this is my heart! Vito doesn't like his shirt. It's really hot in Bali. Crazy hot. I wore a filmy dress so I had it good. The men wore suits! They were really sweating in the heat. But, as these photos show, the boys still looked as cool as a cucumber (sorry for the cliche but it was so hot in Bali, I just wanted something refreshing, like a cucumber shake!).

Here comes the bride! I think my jaw dropped when I saw her. If I had been beside Jukka, I'd have said, "Jukka, you never let on that she was that beautiful, you lucky ass!"

Michelle and Jukka, exchanging their vows in the amber light of the setting sun. They just giggled and smiled at each other and kissed throughout the wedding. Sooo romantic.

Here they are, holding hands. Aww! Love! Dearest Jukka and Michelle, may you have a marriage strong in love, faith, friendship, joy, humor and sex! That combo is what works for Vince and me!

And here we are, happy for our friend. I love weddings. They just affirm my faith in mankind, that we're still silly and sweet and innocent and brave and strong and believers in love.

Poor tired Vito. He's chewing on my turquoise necklace. The party was held a few steps from the beach, by the pool, and we had delicious Indonesian cuisine. We ended the day with dancing and laughter and Game of Thrones. Yep, it was a gathering of nerds!

And that was our Bali trip! Hope you enjoyed it as much as Vito did!

A month ago today, I was packing for our first trip abroad as a family. We went to Bali, Indonesia, for the wedding of one of Vince's best friends, Jukka.

This is us at the airport on a really rainy, very early morning. Vince and I are sleepy but excited. Vito is excited. Period!

Vito just learned to walk so, while Vince filled out immigration forms, Vito wandered about. He was just amazed at the huge space. He just had to explore it!

Hi Vito! Hi Vince! I love those two boys to bits! They wore matching shirts. So cute and preppy!

Vito and the smile that can melt any heart. Such a cutie pie!

His first international flight! So excited! We didn't have a problem at all. Was really scared he'd be one of those babies that cry and cry on the plane. Thank goodness he was just happy all the time!

This is us in Singapore. It's Vito's first bus ride, too. Later on, when we took the train from one terminal to another, Vito had his first train ride, too. Many firsts!

Still at Singapore. You can tell that someone's pretty pumped. Just lookit that silly face! Meanwhile, my arms were dying at this point!

By the way, my son's kind of a little flirt. Every time he sees pretty girls, he unleashes his charm. And it's pretty lethal, his charm. I let him loose on the plane aisle. Seemed like an okay thing to do since I could hear oohs and aahs and gurgles of adoration. When he came back to us, however, Vito seemed upset about something. Someone stole a kiss!

At Bali finally! Where the flowers grow in thick clusters...

Where the clime is hot and makes everyone, like this fat dog, lazy...

And this cute baby, too! Look at his wrinkly-nose yawn (he got that from his father). Must be the fresh air. Vito ain't used to it. I like that I didn't have to put on makeup and brush my hair. Such freedom from the city!

There's the little punk, ready for his swim! That's his porn star trunks. I love his porn star trunks!

Our villa was swarming with mosquitoes so we all slept under dreamy nets that kinda didn't work since Vito still woke up with red dots all over him. I was so freaked out! Vito's first mosquito bites! Even though I slathered him with insect repellent, those pesky bugs still got to him.

One more thing that freaked me out? The many many many statues of their gods. Devil worship! Sorry, that's the Born Again in me talking. Vince kept rolling his eyes at me and laughing at my Born-Again-ness. Well, even if I weren't Born Again, they are pretty scary. Look at Vito. I rest my case!

Next post: The romantic sunset wedding!

I love this!

Took me back to 2001. I was 24 years old, living in a one-bedroom unit along Shaw Blvd. Vince and I watched Moulin Rouge! at Megamall, the last full show. We walked out of the mall at half past midnight, the streets were deserted and a big bright full moon was high up in the sky, making the streets and buildings glow. We walked hand-in-hand down ADB Ave, then Vince twirled me about on San Miguel Ave, while we sang, "How wonderful life is now you're in the world!"

Life is wonderful indeed.

My favorite section in Vanity Fair is the Proust Questionnaire. I think it's great they choose old people to answer it. Yes, old! Old people have seen and experienced a lot so I always get amazed and inspired by their frankness and wisdom.

Me at 34. Some say old, some say young.

Now, at 34, I'm not old. Well, depends on who you ask. I had a laser facial last week and someone Tweeted me, "Do you recommend that facial on me?" And I Tweeted back, "It's best for those in their mid-30s and above." And she replied, "Ugh, that's old!"

Anyway, I want to answer the Proust Questionnaire every year, just to see if my answers will change. I imagine that as I grow older, the answers will change. I hope not, though! I want to believe that at 34, I know myself. But life is always surprising!

What is your idea of perfect happiness?
Cuddling in bed with my husband Vince and son Vito.




What is your greatest fear?
Losing Vince and Vito.

What is the trait you most deplore in yourself?
Laziness.

What is the trait you most deplore in others?
That abominable combination of laziness, arrogance, insecurity and, strangely enough, entitlement to the fruits of others' labor!

Which living person do you most admire?
Right now, I admire Gwyneth Paltrow for her achievements in her field, her constant evolution, her love for her family and friends, and her style. But I admire anyone who makes their own dreams come true.

What is your greatest extravagance?
Generosity.

What is your current state of mind?
Overwhelmed!

What do you consider the most overrated virtue?
Virginity.

On what occasion do you lie?
When telling the truth will hurt the person unnecessarily.

What is the quality you most like in a man?
Quiet authority. Not a lot of men have this, sadly.

What is the quality you most like in a woman?
Unconditional love.

Which words or phrases do you most overuse?
Actually, very, and ten thousand years.

What or who is the greatest love of your life?
My husband and my son.

When and where were you happiest?
My wedding in 2007 was fun. But now? It's every time I'm cuddling with Vince and Vito. That's every day. I'm a lucky girl.




Which talent would you most like to have?
To dance really well!

What is your favorite occupation?
Mine.

What is your most marked characteristic?
Passion.

What do you most value in your friends?
Their insistence that I am worth loving.

Who is your favorite hero of fiction?
Samwise Gamgee.

Who are your heroes in real life?
The generous people, like my husband, my in-laws, my mother, my friends.

What is that you most dislike?
Cowardice.



What is your greatest regret?
Ignoring my mother when she was alive.

How would you like to die?
Quietly, when my son already has his own family, love and happiness. Yes, I can leave this life then.

What is your motto?
"The brave may not live forever, but cowards never live at all."

Summer is definitely over because today I dusted off the leather jacket and checked twice if I brought my umbrella. I don't mourn the end of summer because I've always been a rainy kind of gal, the fatter the raindrops, the louder the thunder, the better. Of course, it's best with a really thick book!

But I can't say I didn't enjoy the sun this year, especially since we have a little boy now. And, oh, how he loved our trip to Shangri-la Mactan!

We went there with Vito's entire Sales family (thanks, Mom and Dad!) and swam and ate and slept to our hearts' content. I won't show the photos of Vito's cousins here since they're all of school age but since Vito is too young to protest, let me show off my handsome boy's pics!

Vince shows Vito the jumbo jet we're about to board.

It's Vito's first plane ticket!

Vito's first plane ride was a smooth flight.

The baby was absolutely delighted with the huge bed! He kept exploring it. Vince, I guess we need a bigger bed!

See how excited he is?!

The little guy inspects the big garden. "Green, Mama! What is all that green?!"

Vito's first beach encounter!

He hated the sand. He's like me!

Poor darling was so upset whenever his feet touched the sand! Mama had to comfort him.

Good thing the pool was a success!

Where did you go this summer?