TOPAZ HORIZON

Vince and I were talking about how blogging now is the Wild Wild West, no accountability, no rules, no code of ethics, and how this trend is alarming. Vince said that readers will eventually tire of the nasty blogs and support blogs that make their life better. And where readers are, advertising will follow.

He's a changed man, folks!

Vince: (in a hopeful tone) Readers will smarten up. 

Me: They already are. Did you know that Perez Hilton has changed the attitude of his blog? (source)

Vince: Wow.

Me: He said that all the suicides last year, the ones caused by bullying, made him think about his blog and how he's a big bully himself, writing all those mean things about stars. And he apologized to Jennifer Aniston no less! And she forgave him (source). He said, "I really want to be part of the solution and not part of the problem." (source)

My next chapter is to create an even  better blog!

Vince: I don't know why people never learned from Oprah. Talk shows used to be all trash and sensationalism. Really! Remember those days?

Me: Yes!

Vince: Oprah said she would not change her programming. She avoided that even though the market was going in that direction. Years later, the others are all gone and she's a billionaire. So be Oprah, rabbit!

Yes. I will be the Oprah of blogging! Positive vibes all around. Love love love!

Okay, so I said I don't like talking about serious stuff in my blog because it just invites controversy. But ever since that Big Bad Blogger issue a few weeks back, some people have been asking and asking and asking me about how I, a blogger, can resist becoming a big bad blogger myself.

And I always say, "That's because I'm a journalist first and I'm guided by journalism ethics and principles. It's a very slippery slide to corruption, especially with all the power I can wield with words. But I can resist it. It can be done."

What is corrupt behavior?
1. Blackmailing people (i.e. "If you don't do this, I'll blog about you!")
2. Demanding payment (in cash or in kind) for a story
3. Acting high and mighty (i.e. "Why did I get an invite late? Do you know WHO I AM?")

I started blogging in 2005, when nobody cared about bloggers. Back then, blogging was untainted by corruption. Blogging used to be a beautiful thing. It was an arena of people just writing for the sake of expressing oneself, for entertainment, for the love of writing and art and truth. But now that it's been invaded by advertising and PR, unscrupulous people have realized that they can use blogs as a weapon, as a tool for getting what they want.

I'm glad I was a writer first before I became a blogger. I used to correct people when they say, "You're a blogger?" with "Actually, I'm a writer with an online presence." But yeah, sure, I'm a blogger! But let me tell you why I wanted to be known as a writer first. A writer's loyalty is only towards the truth and to the readers. When I blog, I think about YOU. I don't think about me. Will this post entertain you? Will this make you happy? Will this make you laugh? Will this make you think? Will this help you shop/cook/dress/look better?

Even though I write about my life, I choose the parts of my life that I think YOU will like. That's why some of you think I live in a fairy tale. I don't. But I don't write about my shit because I assume you already have enough stress in your life. Do you really want to know mine?

Now, because the blogosphere has been infiltrated by people who write for money alone, bloggers are viewed with suspicion. People now think bloggers are out to get money, invites to events, and loads of free stuff. This really makes me sad.

I admit I earn from my blog and that I've gotten free stuff but I am always gracious and grateful for the things I get--from little lip balms to an all-expense-paid trip to Singapore, it's all the same to me. I am grateful. I never demand and I never complain. I also do sponsored posts (thanks, Nuffnang!) but even Nuffnang knows I don't always accept their many proposals. That's because I weigh the cost of doing a sponsored post first. Again, is this something I really use and is this something you'll find useful? Bonus na lang that I get paid to write about it! And, like I said in my FAQs, a sponsored post is properly labeled for transparency. But most of the product features I write about are really stuff I own or purchased or want (but can't afford yet!), some are "pakiusap" lang. Walang bayad yun.

So I blog because I love to write. I blog because I love to share what I love. I blog because I love my readers. I blog because my readers love me. It's all about love, baby. It's never about the money or the freebies. You can count on that.

But let me start at the very beginning.

Since Mulberry designed a bag for It Girl Alexa Chung, I've always wanted to get my hands on the Alexa.

My friend Nikki proposed to buy one for me last Christmas when she and her family went to Hong Kong. But it's USD 1150. That's quite a bit of money, that Alexa, so I said, "Thanks but (sob) no thanks!" Then I figured I'm sure to find a similar shape here somewhere.

And I did find one in Aldo. It's the same shape and I was actually about to buy but I got very sick and so stayed home to work (Yes! No rest for the weary!) I also had my browser open to Twitter. One Tweet from fashion designer Rajo Laurel intrigued me. He tweeted that he just had the most lovely thing with a link to his blog on Stylebible (click here).

Which is how I discovered the Cambridge satchel! Rajo described it so lovingly and with such delight that I wanted one!
But I thought, "When will I go to London? With an infant in my life, not for a long while!" A few minutes later, Schu tweeted that they are the official distributors here in the Philippines! Schu's Ruby Gan sent me their Facebook album and... Ladies and gentlemen, I'm in love. With the yellow bag and the price!

My only problem with the yellow is if I have my initials stamped in gold, the letters will disappear. So I'm thinking of getting red. But my heart belongs to the yellow! Maybe no initials na lang. Still thinking about those initials. Maybe I shouldn't personalize so I can pass it down to Vito or a daughter one day.

Grabe, this Twitter, ha. Parang mapapa-gastos ako nang di oras with all the stuff I find (follow me!). Anyway, if you want to order your very own Cambridge satchel, visit Schu's Facebook page for details.

Opened my mail this morning to see this:

I literally squealed inside! I am such a fan of Don Draper, even though he's a huge jerk. He's just so... manly!
I've been missing Mad Men since the season ended. That season was intense! Don had to struggle with his divorce and custody arrangements, a rebellious pre-teen Sally, the death of his closest friend, mentoring the brilliant Peggy, surviving advertising and all this while going through a  rapid opiate detox!

Mad Men is still the best TV drama, even though Boardwalk Empire dethroned it in the recent Golden Globes. I like Boardwalk, too, but it's too soon. Mad Men was at its best the past season. I can't wait for the next season!!!

Meanwhile, since Don's following my Tweets, why don't you do the same?

I am really loving this cool weather we're having lately. My jackets and coats and scarves are finally seeing the light of day once more. So at our monthly Wine Night, I just had to wear a leather jacket.


Outfit details: Zara leather jacket, Bayo knit blouse, Levi's Lady's Style metallic jeans, Anthem platform pumps, Kate Spade bag, Funtote ferris wheel tote, enamel earrings from tiangge

Only five of us showed up last week. Lana and Red were working, and Mariane, Jimboy and Kat were studying abroad.

Nikki showed up in a tux!

Nicole was in her usual black and Nic was in a floral mini dress

Bernard, the thorn among the roses =)

I have to point out Nikki's elegant high bun. I love it! And you know what? It's fake!
She bought it in Bangkok. Her husband, Bern, said that those fake buns (yes, she has more than one) are freaky scary. Oh, our poor men and all you have to deal with to have gorgeous wives!


That was a fun evening. I had to go home early, though. Mommy and wifely duties call! Okay, that's enough outfit posts. I have some shopping posts up next!

When you get invited to have lunch with a gorgeous celebrity, you kinda have to skip the jeans and tee for a nice dress. That's because you wouldn't want to look too bad beside a shining star.



Outfit details:
Zara cream dress, Nine West nude pumps, Fino doctor's bag, Charles & Kieth aviators, Ensembles golden pearl necklace, Chinese good luck beads

Tweetie. Perfect!

Unilever's Jacque Yuengtian. Loving her dress and the black-and-gold  cuff and chunky necklace!

Pond's Age Miracle's Rissa Mananquil is newly engaged!

Well, I tried. Beside the luminous Tweetie de Leon, I still looked like a faded rag doll! If you want to know why I had the immense pleasure of having lunch with this beautiful woman, click here!

I don't believe in astrology. But because of the Chinese New Year coming up in a few days, I've been inundated by horoscopes left and right. And... I'm a likin' what I'm readin'!

In the year of the Metal Rabbit, I, a Fire Dragon, will have unbelievable luck. Well, Dragons are always lucky because it's supposed to be a very powerful sign. But in 2011, my horoscope says I'm to expect good fortune in my career, finances, relationships and health. Hey, that's just about everything! The only thing that's supposed to be bad for me is water sports. And here I was thinking of taking up swimming! Well, scrap that!

Then there's the Western influences on the Eastern year. That means I, a Scorpio, can also check Aries as my horoscope since Aries is the Western equivalent of the Dragon. Huh? Did that confuse you? See this list!

Anyway, so according to this seer, this is what I should expect in 2011:
Scorpio—A year of much entertaining and socializing. Financial gains are indicated. And you are able to consolidate your position to a very high decree. Obstacles are still there but no major obstruction.
Aries—Calm is restored to you in the Year of 2011. The winds of fortune blow on your sails again. Home life is settled and finances are stabilized.

Wow. Looks like a fun year for me! Entertaining, socializing, money coming in, work going well, and calm. Deep blessed calm. As some of you know, 2010 was a year of high drama for me--the joys and fears of new motherhood, and the anguish of having someone so utterly selfish in my life. Ugh, I don't even want to think about the latter one. Anyway, if 2011 will bring calm to my highly strung emotional state, then I welcome this year with open arms!

Vince, since I know you're reading this, I've taken the liberty of reading your horoscope (and please stop rolling your eyes!). You're a Wood Tiger and your Western sign is Aquarius. The Western equivalent of the Tiger is also Aquarius so I didn't get very confused looking you up.

According to this, 2011 is a good year for your career. But it also says you will put in a lot of work for that to happen. And you'll laugh and say, "That is why it will be a good year because I have to work my ass off dammit!" I know, right?! Anyway, lotsa money, lotsa good opportunities, lotsa socializing from May to November. Weird! I honestly cannot see you socializing!

And as for your Western predictions,
Aquarius—A happier year is in store for you. Love and business affairs are in the upswing and things are generally more rosy and any obstacle is easily overcome. Good news is forthcoming.

I love good news! Happiness, love, rosy future, easily overcome obstacles--why, that's just fab!

Vito is a Metal Tiger, a Leo and an Aquarius (Western equivalent). So he will enjoy his home life this year. Well, with you and me as his parents, Vito will most definitely have a fabulous home life!

That's it! I don't believe in this astrology business but I am more than willing to believe that in 2011, everything will be alright. I don't even need the foretold money and career heights; I just want that peace and calm and goodness.

Have a good and blessed year, everyone!

Someone asked me, "Why are you so quiet about the Big Bad Blogger issue?"

First, I promised to keep this blog about silliness and shopping and fashion and frivolity.

Second, if you noticed, I don't really comment on issues. I didn't campaign for anyone in the elections, I didn't say anything about the bus hostage tragedy or about Hubert Webb's release... I just don't. The few times I did write about serious stuff (the Maguindanao Massacre and Ondoy), I got some negative comments.

Third, I address the sponsored posts issue in my FAQs.

So anyway. Here's what I have to say about that whole brouhaha:

click to enlarge

That's all.

There's a huge Baby Co. sale at Megamall right about now and I've been wanting to go except that I am sick. A cold that started three weeks ago finally took a dramatic turn for the worse and I have taken to bed.

Anyway, I don't really need anything for Vito. Being the youngest boy in the male-dominated Sales family, he's inherited a ton of clothes and baby things from his cousins. I just wanted to get foodie things like a bowl, a sippy cup, a rubber-tipped spoon, a food grinder and... Well, I just wanted to check things out! I also wanted to go to the department store and get slipcovers for our dining chairs. With Vito about to embark on solid food in a couple of weeks, our lovely house is in danger!

My onesies, socks, bibs, stroller, carrier, bath tub... all for free!

Anyway, I also wanted to shop because I've been dealing with this nagging feeling that I'm not getting Vito new stuff. You know? His stuff. It was Vince who started it. He's the youngest in his family and he always got his brother's hand-me-downs. So even though he likes it that we haven't spent anything on Vito's clothes and stuff, he also feels bad that we aren't even trying to get him new things.

I'm no stranger to hand-me-downs either. Because my family didn't have much when I was growing up, I got the clothes of my cousins. And oh those clothes were so beautiful! So I have a good experience with second-hand stuff. Hence, my fascination with eBay!

DVF silk ladybug shift dress from eBay!

Miu Miu by Prada silk dress from eBay!

H&M belted LBD from eBay!

But then I have friends who also gave birth this year. And they tell me about how the onesies here are so cute or the bibs over there are so clever or how the strollers now are so high-tech... and I get insecure. There are so many nice new things out there! Should I rush out and get them for my Vito? After all, he is my first born. My only child. Should I try harder? Am I taking this save-the-planet thing a bit too far? Am I relying too much on the kindness and oh so wonderful generosity of my Sales family? (Thanks, Anj! Thanks, Lizelle!)

I really don't want to care but it's so strange how a little baby changes everything!

I am not as clever as I thought!

Alas, I didn't invent the word 'tweetheart'! It says so here.

I'm on Twitter! Well, I've been a Twit for sometime now but haven't really been Tweeting. Tweeting is best done from a mobile phone but since I am not a mobile phone person (people hate that I don't answer calls and texts. And if I do, it takes me hours or even days to reply!), the Tweeting isn't that easy.

Well, since I'm in front of the computer most times, I realized I can make this Tweeting work! Follow my Tweets, my friends! I'm kinda getting the hang of it.

One of my resolutions for 2011 was to change the look of my blog. That black thing was getting very old.

Well, now that I've changed the look, I've been feeling like changing some other things, too. Herewith are my blog resolutions:

• I will really try to reply to comments I publish this 2011. Maybe not every comment, though!
• I will answer questions from my readers. Real questions!
• I will put an outfit post every week. I admit that this is very hard. I'm not a fabulous dresser and I don't have a lot of clothes. All those fashion blogs out there are intimidating. Granted, this isn't a fashion blog but it's my hope that a fashion post will make me work harder to lose the baby weight (and start dressing my age)!
• I will do a day-in-the-life post maybe once or twice a month. It'll be fun to give you a peek at what I do on a random day!
• I will promote blogs more. There are so many nice blogs out there! No one used to read silly me but now I get 500 (or more!) of you daily. So I'd like to support other bloggers, too.

How about you? Any blog resolutions?

I promised this post on my Market Day! entry so here it is--simple dishes with just a few ingredients.

Tortang Talong
Grill eggplants until soft and skin is peeling off. Peel skin then mash the eggplant. Whisk some eggs and dip eggplant into eggs. Fry. Serve with ketchup. I like the spicy one of Del Monte.

Steamed Veggies
Looking for a diet pill that works? Try this instead! Slice up carrots, sayote and beans. Or broccoli or asparagus. Steam for about 5 minutes--more if you like your veggies soft. Serve with fish or any meat dish. Personally, I prefer roasted veggies. They're more flavorful!

Beef and Beans Stir Fry
This is beyond simple! Stir fry beef strips and green beans in a wok. Add oyster sauce to taste. Serve!

Omelette
This is what Vince and I eat for breakfast twice a week. Saute chopped onions and tomatoes. Beat eggs then pour into pan. Fold when edges start to bubble. Serve with toast or fried rice.

Upo't Miswa
My Lola Auring taught me this--it can feed a crowd because an upo is so big! Slice up a big upo. Saute garlic, onions and ground meat (beef or pork). Pour in a few cups of water. Once it boils, put miswa noodles. Simmer till noodles are soft. Serve.

Gourmet Fries
Here's a tasty snack! Slice potatoes into long strips. Deep fry or bake. Drain onto a paper towel. Smother with parmesan cheese and ground pepper.

Adobong Kangkong
Saute lotsa garlic. Add kangkong leaves and stalks (cut 1-inch). Add half a cup of vinegar and soy sauce. Serve! You can also just stir fry kankong with bagoong. So easy and delicious!

Tuna Pasta
Always have pasta in your pantry and when guests arrive, here's the perfect easy dish to whip up! In olive oil, saute garlic, onions, quartered tomatoes and tuna flakes. If you like olives, add those. Mix with cooked pasta. You can add basil leaves, too.

Mac and Cheese
The kids will love to cook and eat this. Cook macaroni. Drain. Add butter and cheese and stir gently until cheese melts. Yum!

Potato and Egg Salad
Boil potatoes (you can keep the peel, just scrub a dub dub!). Cut potatoes into 1-inch chunks. Boil eggs. Quarter eggs. Toss very gently with mayonnaise. Chill in fridge. You can add bacon bits, chopped raw onion and celery, too, of you want more flavor.

There you have it! There's a lot more you can cook and I didn't even include roasting, grilling and baking. Believe me, cooking is the easiest and healthiest thing you can do! For more easy tips, check out my friend Mariel's post on eating well.

Just before Christmas, readers were asking me advice on what gifts do I suggest or they were curious about gifts that I do give to my loved ones. Because I had such a busy schedule, I wasn't able to reply. I really wanted to write a good post because, my dear readers, I take gift-giving very seriously!

Now, this post isn't too late. After all, Valentine's Day is coming up. And lotsa birthdays, weddings and parties, too! So here's my ultra-long post on gift giving. But before that, I'll give you a peek at what Vince and I want.

For Valentine's Day, I don't have anything for Vince yet. But for his birthday, I got him a set of really cool toy lens for the Olympus E-PL1.

For me (ahem ahem), I'd love one (or both!) of these:

Baby giraffe ring holder  Vince knows I love rings but he will get why this particular animal--and not rabbits!--is so perfect for me.

Necklace with hand-stamped pendants So charming and sweet and simple! And I love hand-stamping. I made a pewter bowl and hand-stamped it with our names. My necklace would read Vince, Frances, Vito

Vince and I are very good gifters. I think regular readers know this fact! We have certain rules when it comes to giving gifts.

1. They must not be useful. 
By that we mean, they have to be fabulous! When our friends Mariel and Alvin got married, we didn't give them a rice cooker or a wall clock, we gave them a fondue set. Frivolous, I know, but fun!

We don't give socks or underwear or mouthwash. Gifts aren't supposed to be stuff your loved ones can buy for themselves.

2. If they must be useful, they must be OTT. 
That's Over The Top. This past Christmas, my sister-in-law Lizelle wanted a card holder to organize her many credit and discount cards. I searched far and wide till I found an exquisite card holder made of supple Italian cowhide. The awesome smell of leather was seeping through the gift wrapper! She loved it!

So if the newlyweds asked for cutlery, give them silver-plated heavy ones. If they asked for bedsheets, give them the high thread count. If your friend asked for a journal, give a Moleskine.

3. Add a little extra. 
Some people really know what they want so if you give them something else--no matter how fab--they might not appreciate it. My family-in-law is very specific. Vince's niece Elizabeth wanted a Sylvanian doll. Vince gave her a pair, and since Elizabeth is a musician, he added a little baby grand piano and vintage microphone for the dolls. Elizabeth was delighted!

So if your friend asked for a book, give the book and throw in personalized book plates. If she asked for a pen, have her name engraved on it. If she asked for a blender, add some fruits!

4. Personalize it.
And I don't just mean the engraving and monogramming part. My sister Jacqui, being 21, wants clothes. But I don't want to choose her clothes for her because young women that age don't like to be told what to wear! So I got gift certificates from Forever 21 and The Ramp so that she can shop for herself. It doesn't have to be GCs. Remember my new Kate Spade Sutton Place Marielly bag? Sutton Place is a New York suburb. I have a stylish friend who lives in New York City named Mariel. So I bought her that bag. She loves it!

So for your foodie friend, buy her a dinner at a nice restaurant. For your spa-holic sister, get her a massage session. For your movie buff brother, get him passes to a 3D theater.

Giving gifts is an exciting thing to do. I always enjoy the hunt for the perfect gift. I like making people happy! Gifts that are whimsical, frivolous, fun and entertaining are a joy to give and receive. Here are more suggestions for certain occasions that always befuddle people:

Scented candles Make sure the recipients aren't sensitive to scents!

Monogrammed throws Choose neutral tones like white and cream.

Picture frames A collection of simple ones looks nice. Or you can get one fantastic piece in silver or enamel.

Potted flowering plants or herbs Do not give a bouquet because then she'll have to find a vase and water them when she should be with her guests. Potted plants will be enjoyed way after the party's done.

Dessert Guests usually volunteer to bring dessert but these chocolate-covered strawberries are best because your hostess won't have to bring out plates and spoons and knives and wash up!

Wine decanter A bottle of wine is a usual hostess gift, too. Why not add a little extra? This graceful decanter set is love.

Turtle night lamp A night lamp is very useful--for parents getting up in the middle of the night to change diapers and for little ones who're afraid of the dark. Remember to add whimsy to the usefulness!

Baby bath robe Again, very useful. So make sure the robe is the softest you can find and personalize it with the little cutie's name or initials or nickname.

Matching cuffs Maybe not for the shower but for a new mommy to a little girl. This will definitely be a prized set!

Then there are truly some gifts that are useless. Figurines, for example! Try not to give those unless you are positively certain that the recipient collects them!

KT, sweetheart, I'm sure you've seen Chanel's Resort St. Tropez Collection 2011. This particular cashmere mini dress with guipure details caught my eye:

The dress is GBP 1,652 or USD 2,600

On Clemence Poesy, ES Magazine

On Emma Roberts, Marie Claire Nov 2010 issue

On Jessica Alba, Elle Dec 2010 issue

I'm sure, Kate, you know why that dress piqued my interest. In 2007, you created the most fabulous flowergirl-and-bridesmaid dresses for my wedding. Yes, it's different and yet very very similar. Chanel's base is pink while yours is brown.

Bridesmaid Mariel (second from left) and the coolest Summit Media girls!

The flower girls and junior bridesmaid

I like what you did better. Yes, I prefer yours over Chanel!

Hubby was sick last weekend, then yesterday I caught the bug, too. That's what happens when you sleep together! And in this case, I mean sleep literally.

I don't think my coughs and colds will be as bad as Vince's, though. I've fortified my system with gingery broths and lemongrass tea (make your own!). I've even gone to Murad for my skin treatment that includes Vitamin C serum for the face so that if any germs settle on my skin, the anti-oxidants will kill it. Just a silly theory--don't quote me!

Still, no rest for the weary. I have a lot of work to do, errands, events. And then there's the big baby, who is, thankfully, better. He caught the bug too but because I am breastfeeding him, he gets the antibodies my body's producing to fight this cold. And now Vito's like the Energizer bunny! He's super cute. Go to my mommy blog for more photos of this baby in red.

So there. Just an update! I got a lot of feedback in my previous post, and some have emailed me asking for recipes that have just 3 ingredients. These are from exhausted wives/moms who are looking for quick and inexpensive meals to make. Single women living in the big city have also emailed with the same request. And I will answer in my next post. For now, I will sleep!